


Beast

by jambajunkie



Category: Shall We Date?: Wizardess Heart+
Genre: Alternate Universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-15
Updated: 2016-01-25
Packaged: 2018-04-14 21:00:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 20,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4579923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jambajunkie/pseuds/jambajunkie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clara Hart never enrolled at Gedonelune Royal Magic Academy. One night, during a full moon, she encounters an injured beast in the woods. Yukiya x MC, AU. Complete.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

There was a little blue house in the mountains that the mail owls knew well. They loved the little orphan girl who lived there, because she was always so happy to see them, and always took the time to scratch behind their stout necks where they couldn’t reach themselves. Best of all, she could speak to them, and if they were injured she could always heal their wounds.

Every six months a strong young owl would be dispatched to carry a heavy scroll of paper from the little blue house far, far away, off to the capital of Gedonelune. It was an application, the owls discovered, addressed to a great school far away. But sadly the girl never received anything back for her efforts. Still, she continued to dream, even as the years flew by.

In the meantime, the girl, Clara, lived a simple life. Every morning she’d receive visits from various townspeople, worried about their sick animals. She’d speak to the creatures, understand their worries, and soothe their hurts. Townspeople paid her in Lune, or sometimes in much-needed goods, like flour or cloth – or sometimes in sweets, which the girl adored – like all girls.

In the afternoons she would see to her house and chores, running errands about town, and bartering her surpluses for what she needed. And in the evening, she would study and practice magic – or at least, to the best of her ability. Somehow it never seemed to go well, the most basic spells still going awry, except when an animal was involved.

In time, even Clara’s dreams began to fade, as her own little failures piled up, and she began to wonder if perhaps, this little town, and her little magical quirks, were as much a destiny as she might ever have.

* * *

One spring night, Clara awakened in the middle of the night, having been roused by an odd dream. As she turned over to settle back into bed, she noticed a telltale blue glow from outside her window. Her heart quickened, and she couldn’t help but giggle in excitement. She abandoned the bed to dress for the outdoors, pulling on a heavy cloak and thick shoes. As she headed out the door, she took a basket under her arm.

At the forest’s edge, she bent down to examine the source of the light. These were glowcap mushrooms, and they only grew once in a blue moon. Indeed, she looked up, and tonight the full moon, the second this month, shone as bright as ever, soothing her and engulfing her in serenity even as it lit her way. Clara carefully loosened the glowcap from the soil, tucking it in her basket, and moved towards more of the blue lights.

Clara loved mushrooms, and they formed a large part of her diet because she couldn’t quite bring herself to eat meat. But mushrooms were hearty and wonderful, and she loved stuffing them with savory fillings and grilling them in the pit behind her house. Glowcaps were even more special, not just because of their fragrant, delicate flavor, but because when pressed, they released a beautiful, incandescent oil that was the source of their light. It was an utterly magical phenomenon. Long ago, Clara’s mother had walked through the forest with her on one such blue moon night, and together they’d gathered mushrooms until they couldn’t carry anymore. The fragrant oils, displayed in jars around her home, lit up their nights for months. This time, the mushrooms would make a wonderful meal, and she could trade the oil at the market, as glowcap oil was a valuable reagent used in magical tools.

Now Clara wandered through the forest alone, cheerfully collecting the mushrooms, plucking them lovingly from the ground until her basket itself was glowing as brightly as daylight, or would have been if she had not covered her quarry with a blanket. She reached the river, and slightly weary from the work of carrying the full basket around, decided to sit on the grassy bank and rest against a log. A chorus of frogs was singing in the reeds nearby, and soon Clara felt herself falling asleep.

She awoke suddenly to silence. Blinking, she looked around, letting her eyes adjust to the darkness. The silence chilled her immediately because silence was a bad thing in the wilderness. She couldn’t hear the voices of any nightingales, and the frogs had disappeared.

Then, from the corner of her eye, she saw a silhouette moving in the darkness. It was a large, dark beast – like a lion, but with jet black fur. Two sharp purple horns curved behind its ears, and a pair of gleaming fangs shone from its mouth. It was staring into the water, which reflected a pair of glowing yellow eyes.

Clara swallowed a gasp, half of fear, and half of awe. It was a magical creature. And it was clearly no ordinary magical creature, but something powerful and dignified, nothing like the Wing rabbits she’d seen in her books.

And, she realized, it was injured. It was dipping its paw into the water, grunting in pain as it did so. Clara’s heart immediately tightened in sympathy, and without thinking, she stood. “Mr. Lion!”

The creature jerked, and the sharp yellow gaze came to rest on her.

Clara gulped. _It’s okay_ , she thought. _I can talk to him. He won’t do anything if I tell him I can help._ “Is your paw hurt? I can heal you!” She paused, uncertain how she should address a magical creature.

The creature stared at her, but said nothing. _Does he understand?_ she wondered. “What’s your name?” And then she took a step forward.

The creature growled menacingly. The sound skittered down Clara’s spine, and she shivered. It took a step back, but she saw it wince as it put pressure on the injured paw.

“I’m s-sorry,” she said. “I’ll stay right here, then!” She sat down, barely noticing that her clothes were getting wet from the damp rocks on the riverbank. “I’m Clara, and I’m a wizardess. I specialize in healing animals.” She smiled ruefully. “I’m not good at much else,” she admitted, her fear gradually lessening as she spoke. “But I can talk to them and heal them. Won’t you tell me your name?” She paused.

The beast hesitated, still silent.

“I was out gathering glowcaps,” she continued, unoffended. “They only grow once in a blue moon. They’re very delicious in a stew! Do you like mushrooms?”

The beast’s gaze flickered to her basket of mushrooms, still covered, nearby.

“Would you like some? I’m happy to share.” To her delight, the creature nodded, very hesitantly, and Clara grinned with excitement. She stood, turning in the direction of her basket – and then her foot slipped on the wet rocks.

With a shriek, she tumbled into the river. The cold water rushed up to surround her, and she gasped, inhaling a mouthful of water. Clara had grown up playing in the river, and normally, it was quite shallow. But now, the spring rains had caused the river to swell, and she knew that there were submerged rocks. The current was surprisingly strong, and even as she tried to kick to the surface, she felt herself being swept along downstream.

She screamed. She thought she glimpsed, in one frantic moment, a flash of yellow eyes as the beast chased her along the bank – and then suddenly, she felt something strike her head and she knew nothing else.

* * *

Clara woke sometime later to a sharp headache. She gasped in pain and surprise, and then heard a bit of a scuffle. Then, a warm hand was smoothing down her hair, patting her head soothingly. She exhaled, finding that the pain went away if she was careful and moved slowly.

Her limbs seemed to be fine, if a little sore, and she was warm, bundled up under familiar covers. She opened her eyes, squinting in the morning light streaming through the window. She was back in her bed, in her home…but she wasn’t alone.

She peered up, then yelped. Standing next to her bedside, patting her head, was a surprisingly handsome man, with dark hair and an eyepatch. She’d never seen him before – certainly not in town. _I’d have remembered someone this handsome_ , she thought, dazedly. He studied her back, wordlessly.

“H-hello?” she ventured, sitting up slowly.

“Be careful,” he said tonelessly. “Take it easy until your head heals. Are you cold?”

“Um, n-no,” she replied. Her face felt rather warm, in fact, as she blushed. “Who are you?”

Now that she got a look at him, Clara realized that he was probably closer to her age. His clothes were rumpled, a little travel worn. And he was a little on the thin side, as if he hadn’t eaten well.

“Here.” He passed her a bowl of steaming liquid. “It’s hot.”

“Did you…find me last night? In the river?”

He inclined his head in what passed for a nod. “You had washed downstream,” he explained.

She smiled at him gratefully. “T-thanks. How did you know this was my house?”

He gestured to the bowl, as if reminding her. Clara looked down at it. “Oh! It smells so good!” She tried a spoonful. It was vegetable soup…but there was something else in it. “Is this…magic soup? A-are you a wizard?!”

He nodded, and she laughed in excitement. “That’s amazing! You need to show me how to do this!” She sipped the soup, enjoying the flavor, the warmth, and the subtle magical healing imbued into each spoonful. “You must be very skilled. What’s your name?”

He hesitated, looking down to the ground. “Yukiya.”

Clara beamed. “I’m Clara. Yukiya, thank you for saving me and making me this soup!” Yukiya nodded briefly, and then moved away, leaving her to finish her meal. _He’s a quiet one_ , Clara thought, _but it seems like he’s very nice! And he can cook! And he’s a wizard…I can’t wait to talk to him more!_

But as she moved to the counter to put away her finished bowl, Yukiya headed to the door. “Yukiya?” she asked. “Where are you going?”

“You’re better,” he answered. “I’m done here.”

“Oh, but…” Clara trailed off as he disappeared through the door, shutting it soundly behind him. When she opened it and poked her head out, looking down the street, he was nowhere to be seen.

“Yukiya…” she sighed. Then she noticed a familiar basket by the door. She kneeled down and pulled back the blanket to reveal the blue glowcaps. “My mushrooms! Did he bring them back here too?”

And then her brow furrowed. “But…if I got washed downstream…how did he find them and know they were mine?”

* * *

A few days later, Clara was seeing to an injured sheepdog when she heard something disturbing.

The dog panted cheerfully as Clara set and wrapped her leg. “How did you get this, Winnie?” Clara asked, snipping off the end of the bandage.

“My master heard a strange noise, and I smelled something strange too. I went outside and there was a big creature behind the farm, in our crops!” Winnie barked in remembered excitement, as Clara secured the ends of the bandage. “So I ran after him, and I chased him all the way to the fence!” The dog wagged her tail proudly. “He jumped over, but I think he hurt his leg landing. Then he left.” Then she whined. “But then I realized that I’d hurt my leg too, tripping over a rabbit hole when I was chasing him.”

“A strange creature?” Clara frowned. “What did he look like?”

Winnie tilted her head. “Big and dark. But he smelled…kind of like your house smells now.” The dog whined. “Be careful Clara! Maybe he was here too.”

“Oh…well…” Clara patted the dog’s head, troubled. “I haven’t seen anything like that, but I’ll watch out. Now you go on, okay? Don’t run around for a few days to let that leg heal up.”

The sheepdog licked her hand and then nosed the door open, slipping outside. Clara began cleaning up the table where she saw her patients, putting away her supplies. _A strange creature…could it be…_ She had gone back to that part of the river, but hadn’t found any trace of the magical creature that she’d encountered. But it had definitely hurt its paw. _I wonder if it’s still around._ She resolved to go out and search again.

Then, she noticed something gray and furry through her window. She froze. “Is that a _wolf_?” Clara crept slowly to the window. Indeed, a wolf stood in her garden, nosing lazily at a lavender plant. Clara grinned in excitement, running to her kitchen and grabbing one of the bones that she’d been saving for dogs. She opened the door into her garden.

“Hello, Mr. Wolf!”

The wolf jumped and then stared at her, looking surprised. Then he turned his head to the side in a clear gesture of dismissal. Clara faltered a bit – most animals were overjoyed to speak to her.

“Um, I have this bone for you, if you’d like it.” She placed the bone a few feet away. “Are you just visiting, Mr. Wolf?”

The wolf gazed at the bone. Clara got a sense of reluctant longing, before the wolf eyed her one more time, a bit condescendingly. Then he grabbed the bone from the ground, and loped into the woods.

“Wait, Mr. Wolf!” Clara took off at a run after him.

The wolf led her to the river. Clara squinted at the sunlight, reflected off the water, before she turned and saw a familiar figure lying on a grassy embankment. “Yukiya!” She ran over to him. The wolf was sitting a few feet away, chomping at the bone.

Yukiya opened his eyes and gazed at her sleepily. “Hm? Who is it?”

Clara’s face fell. “You don’t remember…?”

Yukiya frowned. “Is it…Clara?”

“Yes!” she laughed, delighted. “Is this your wolf?”

“…Sort of.”

“What’s his name?”

“Name?” Yukiya looked surprised. “I don’t know. He’s never told me.”

 _Wha…_ A familiar like that and he didn’t have a name? From where he sat, the wolf huffed in disdain. Clara got the distinct impression that she was being judged and found wanting.

She shrugged it off and sat down beside Yukiya. “It’s such a nice day!” she exclaimed.

“Yeah.”

Then, silence.

 _Definitely not a talker_ , Clara thought. But she was undeterred. “I haven’t seen you before. Where do you live, Yukiya?”

There was a pause before Yukiya answered. “Far away.”

“Oh. Are you traveling?”

“…Yeah.”

He didn’t seem to want to talk about that, either. Clara had found that amongst humans and animals alike, almost everyone enjoyed talking about themselves, so she was dumbfounded that Yukiya seemed not to. She hummed in thought, before remembering something. “Oh! Yukiya…will you show me some magic?”

“What?” Yukiya’s eyes, which had been about to close, snapped open at that.

“You’re a wizard, right?” She peeked at his clothes, looking for some sign of a wand. “Isn’t that what you said? I’m a wizardess too, but…” she faltered. “I’m not a very good one. I can’t do much. I can only use spells on animals.”

“I see.”

Clara frowned. He sounded rather uninterested…but maybe he was just like that all the time? Yukiya was certainly hard to read. He seemed to generally be expressionless, plus his eyepatch obscured almost half his face.

“I was hoping you could show me some magic,” Clara began again. “Maybe you can help me figure out what I’m doing wrong?”

She couldn’t really tell for certain, but it seemed like Yukiya’s expression had darkened. The wolf let out a snicker. “No,” Yukiya answered, with a surprising amount of firmness.

“Aww…” Clara sighed. “P-please?”

“Why?” Yukiya sat up, seeing to pay full attention to her for the first time.

Clara smiled sunnily. “I’m trying to get into Gedonelune Royal Magic Academy!” she explained. She thought she saw a shadow pass over Yukiya’s face, but she wasn’t sure. “I keep applying every year…but I haven’t made it yet. My magic isn’t too good, but I want to make it better.”

“But…why?” Clara thought she could detect a bit of a frown in Yukiya’s words. “Why do you want to learn magic?”

Clara blinked. It was an odd question. She had never really thought about it…but… “Well, I want to make people happy.”

“Happy?”

“Yeah.” She leaned back onto the grass, staring into the sky. “My parents died a few years ago, due to an epidemic. Since then, the villagers raised me. All I can really do is talk to the animals, and help heal them.” She sighed. “But if I could become a great wizardess…then I could help out in other ways, in thanks for what they did for me.”

Yukiya lay back down, a couple feet away from her. “I’m sorry about your parents.”

“Oh!” Clara smiled. “It’s ok. I miss them, but I try to focus on the happy memories. And the villagers are all very nice, and the animals are good to talk to.” She turned to him. “How about your family, Yukiya?”

He hesitated, a flicker of something she couldn’t name in his expression. “They’re far away.”

“Oh. Is it just you and Wolfy?”

The wolf’s head snapped up, and he looked affronted. “Don’t call me that.”

Clara giggled. “I knew you could understand me!”

They sat in quiet conversation, for a while longer. _Yukiya’s quiet_ , Clara thought, _but he seems like a really kind person_. It seemed, though, that Yukiya, like her, was all alone. So Clara resolved to get to know him better, and to help him.

Then Yukiya looked up, sniffing at the air. “Smells like rain,” he commented.

Clara couldn’t smell anything, but she saw a faraway dark cloud on the horizon. “We should get inside,” she agreed. “Where will you go, Yukiya?”

He shrugged.

“Oh.” Clara smiled. “I know. Come stay at my house!”

“No.”

Her face fell. “Aww. Why not? I want to get to know you better, Yukiya. You seem like a nice person!”

For the first time, Yukiya’s expression changed. Clara thought she saw mild confusion for a moment, before his expression shuttered again. “No. Being around me is a bad idea.”

“Yukiya!” Clara was stunned. _What a thing to say! Is he some kind of…criminal?_ Clara didn’t think so; criminals didn’t save people. “What do you mean?”

He turned away. “Don’t worry about me.” He sounded almost cold, and Clara drew back sadly.

“A-alright…” she stood up, patting at her skirt to remove some stray blades of grass. Suddenly, she remembered something. “Oh! Yukiya!”

“Hmm?”

“You should be careful! A sheepdog told me that she saw a big, dark creature in the woods the other day.”

Yukiya had gone still. The wolf rolled its eyes. Clara hesitated before continuing. “I think I saw him that night before I fell into the river, too.”

“…I see.”

Clara blinked at his seeming lack of concern. _Guess he’s not worried?_ “Um…I don’t think it’s a mean creature…but be careful anyway! If you need some place to go, you can always come to my house, okay?”

For a long moment, Yukiya stared deeply into her eyes, and Clara felt herself grow red from the scrutiny. Finally, he stepped away. “You’re…a strange one,” he muttered.

 _Ugh…_ Clara sighed. Then in the distance, she heard a rumble.

“Thunder…” Yukiya murmured. He turned back. “Clara, go.”

“O-okay…” She turned to leave, hurrying towards the trail that would lead home. As she reached the edge of the forest, she peeked back. He was still watching her.

She waved. To her delight, he slowly raised a hand and waved back.

Grinning, Clara ran all the way home.


	2. Chapter 2

In the next several days, despite her best efforts, Clara found neither Yukiya, his wolf, nor the strange beast. Inquiries around town were met with confused and sometimes sly looks. 

“Is he your boyfriend?” Fran, the baker’s daughter, asked eagerly.

“N-no!” Clara gasped, face flaming, and then she didn’t ask any more people.  Animals would be more understanding – or so she thought.

“Is it like that?” Nellie the cow mused, her calf dozing at her side. “Are you finding someone to have a little one with?”

“There there…it’s okay if you can’t find him. You can still do it without the man!” a hen encouraged, while Clara shook her head furiously.

“Boyfriend!  Boyfriend!” a robin sang.

“Boyfriend!  Boyfriend!” a cuckoo imitated.

Clara hoped beyond hope that Yukiya didn’t share her ability to understand animals, because it seemed the entire animal kingdom had decided that she was spoken for. 

It still gave her no real leads on finding him, but the dogs she asked claimed that his scent lingered strongly, which made her wonder if he were closer than she thought.

Mildred the golden retriever licked her chops.  “I always visit the people that leave me treats,” she said, looking hopeful. Clara took the hint and gave her an extra biscuit. The dog had a point. Yukiya had looked rather thin…if he was traveling, he must not be eating too well, though it was clearly not from his lack of cooking skill. 

So Clara began to leave wrapped sandwiches outside her back door, along with the occasional bone for Wolfy.  And sweets – her lime white chocolate chip cookies, or blueberry muffins, or a little box of homemade macarons in assorted colors.  She left them on her back doorstep each evening, and each morning they were gone. It made her smile.

* * *

On the fourth night she decided to stay up and wait for him.  She sat outside on her back porch as the night grew darker, talking to an owl until the bird flew away to look for mice, and then lay, half-dozing, half-imagining shapes in the stars.  Suddenly a shooting star appeared, fleet and bright, and Clara gasped, jolting awake.  Closing her eyes, she wished, very hard – _I wish Yukiya would appear again!_

And when she opened her eyes again, there he was.

“Yukiya,” she called, and her heart was suffused by such sudden gladness that she was momentarily confused by her own reaction. 

“Why aren’t you in bed?”

“Cause I was waiting for you.” Clara yawned.  “I knew you’d come!  I made you some mushroom stew.”  She held out the bowl, which she’d wrapped in thick cloth to keep warm.

Yukiya hesitated for a moment, and then accepted the bowl.  He began to eat the stew slowly, as if thinking through each bite.

“How is it?” Clara asked.

“…Good.”

Clara beamed.

She sat in silence as he ate, feeling utterly content.  He was expressionless as usual, but she could tell that he enjoyed the food, the way he breathed deeply between spoonfuls to savor the aroma, and how he scraped at the bottom of the bowl with his spoon to capture every drop.  Finally, he set the bowl aside.

“Where’s Wolfy?”

“I don’t know.”

“Oh.” They didn’t seem to have a typical wizard-familiar relationship, Clara thought. Without thinking, she blurted out, “Where do you sleep at night, Yukiya?”

Yukiya gazed at her quizzically, and suddenly Clara flushed.  “I-I didn’t mean…I just wondered…” she trailed off, her ears hot.

“…there’s a cave.”  Yukiya shrugged.  “Not far away.”

“Oh!”  Clara instantly knew the one he was referring to.  In fact she’d hidden there often as a child.  _Of course,_ she thought to herself.  _Why didn’t I look there?  But why is he staying there?  Didn’t he say he was traveling?_

“It can’t be comfortable in the cave,” Clara murmured.  “Is there a bed inside?”

“…No.”

Clara frowned.  “Are you sleeping on the ground?”

“It’s okay.”  Yukiya turned away from her.  “Stop worrying about it.”

“B-But…” Clara trailed off.  “Why won’t you let me help?”

He sat silently, not answering.  Clara was about to speak again when Yukiya suddenly turned about.  “Why?”

“H-huh?”

“Why are you trying to help me? I told you, I’m bad news.”

Clara frowned indignantly.  “Yukiya, you’re a nice person!  You saved me, and made me soup. Bad people don’t do that.”

“It’s…” Yukiya hesitated. “I’m…cursed.”

 _Cursed…_ Clara blinked.  Someone had cursed Yukiya?  _I knew he wasn’t a bad person,_ she thought triumphantly. _It’s something out of his control. But then, why does he avoid people?_

“That doesn’t matter to me,” she replied, confused.

“If you stay around me…you might be cursed too.”

“W-what?” Clara blinked.  Were curses contagious?  She’d never heard of such a thing, and she frowned.  “No way!”

Yukiya said nothing, looking down at the ground.  Clara thought she saw his fists clench.

“I don’t believe it,” Clara declared. “Have you ever cursed anyone else?”

“You fell into the river,” he reminded her.

“W-well, that had nothing to do with you!  You weren’t even there!” Yukiya opened his mouth, as if to protest – but then suddenly seemed to stop himself.  Clara continued triumphantly.  “And anyway, you saved me, and I’m okay, right? I’m tough!  I can take it.”

“Clara…”

“I haven’t gotten sick in years!” She grinned cheekily.  “I’m not scared of your curse, Yukiya.”

“You’re the first person that’s ever said that to me,” he muttered, and this time she could hear the disbelief in every word. 

Her heart clenched.  Had it really been this way for Yukiya?  Had no one accepted him for that reason?  _How terrible…_

“Well you’re stuck with me now,” Clara declared.  “So don’t just disappear again, okay?”

Yukiya stared at her, his one visible eye wide with surprise.  Clara let herself gaze back at him.  He was really very handsome, she thought, his even features illuminated by the moon.  And very tall and broad and… Feeling very small and shy, Clara blushed and glanced away, looking for another topic.

“I need your help anyway,” she added.  “I still need you to help me with magic.”

Yukiya let out a nearly inaudible sigh, but she could sense the tension return to his body.  “You want to get into Gedonelune Royal Magic Academy that bad, huh.”

“Yeah.  I’ve always wanted to, ever since I realized I could use magic,” Clara recalled. “That way, I can be a really great wizardess.”

“Magic isn’t always used for good.”

“H-huh?” Clara’s head swiveled, and she stared back at Yukiya.  He was looking away again, but his voice… It had taken on an even flatter quality.

“Magic can be used to hurt people. Magic is…a curse.”

“W-what – “ Clara gasped. It was something she’d never even considered, that someone should use their gift for harm. After a moment, she ventured in a small voice, “I don’t want to hurt people with magic.” She looked back towards the road that led down to the village, smiling wistfully.  “I just want to make people happy.  To put smiles on their faces.  That’s all.”

In the uncomfortable silence that followed, it was as if Clara could feel her heartbeat in her ears, louder and louder.  _What did he mean?  Magic is a curse?_ She’d never thought about it that way before.  Magic was a blessing.  It allowed her to do something that others couldn’t, even if she was a pathetic novice wizardess who couldn’t even levitate a jug of water. 

She wondered what she sounded like to Yukiya, who’d clearly been trained, and who’d probably seen more in his wanderings than she had in an entire lifetime of living in this town.  Probably foolish and idealistic. And she wondered if that was the way she sounded on her applications, too – offering nothing of value, no real talent, just a little girl’s stubborn and undying dreams.

Maybe, she thought with a sinking heart, that was why she’d never gotten in.

“Fine.”

Clara jolted. “H-Huh?”

“I’ll help.” He turned to her. 

“What…” she blinked. _Does he mean…_ “Y-You…you will?”

“I’ll try.”

She stared at him as it slowly sank in.  “Y-Yukiya…”  Suddenly, her heart felt as light and joyful as a bird, and she laughed aloud.  Jumping up, she moved over to grab his hands.  “Thank you Yukiya!”  She squeezed them.  “Thank you! I’m so happy right now!”

Yukiya glanced downwards, and then looked back up at her.

“Hmm? Is there something wrong?” she asked.

“…Your hands.”

“Oh!” Blushing fiercely, she let go of him. “S-sorry!”  But her embarrassment did nothing to dampen her elation, and she couldn’t help but skip in a circle on the grass, still grinning in joy.

Then she came back and grabbed his hand again, beginning to tug him towards the house.

“Come on!” she giggled.  “I made more cookies.  We can eat them.  And then, we can start!”

“Clara.” His calm, steady voice finally penetrated the haze of her joy.  “It’s nearly midnight.”

“…Oh.”

“We’ll start with your magic tomorrow.  You need to rest.” Then he hesitated. “I’d like a cookie though.”

Clara beamed.  “Of course!”

Between the two of them, they ate the whole batch. 

* * *

The next day, Yukiya knocked softly on her door, and they sat down together to begin magic lessons.  Clara felt halfway between eagerness and trepidation.  She knew her magic was a failure – but to demonstrate it to him meant that she had to fail in front of him, just so that he could help her.

“Why don’t you try to levitate that water jug?” Yukiya gestured, and Clara winced. 

“Um, I’ll try….” She took a breath, pointed her wand, and chanted. “O power that resides within, lift that water jug and bring it to me. Levis Pullma!” To her surprise, a beam of light burst forth from her wand and encircled the jug. Clara’s concentration faltered.  “Did it…work?”

Immediately the beam of light disappeared, and the jug sprouted butterfly wings, and lifted off.  Clara groaned, and began to chase after it, grateful that at least this time, it wasn’t laughing at her.

It was embarrassing.  It was one thing to chase a water jug come to life when she was alone, but in front of Yukiya…

He quickly spared her further mortification, once it was clear that the jug was not going to cooperate. “I command thee to return to thine true form! Supasaman Mundi!”

With a zap, the jug reverted to its nonliving form and dropped into Clara’s waiting arms.  Simultaneously, Yukiya flinched, his hand reflexively moving towards his covered eye. Clara blinked.  _What’s wrong with his eye?_

But in a moment, Yukiya had shaken it off, and was gesturing for her to return. “Why don’t you try to summon water into the jug instead?”

“Ummm, okay.”  Again, Clara closed her eyes and pointed her wand.  As she spoke the words hesitantly, she began to wonder if this had been a bad idea after all.  _It’s too embarrassing to have him watch me._  And then her wand glowed blue with the water spell, and the magical energy poured into the jug.

They peered into it at the same time.  And then suddenly…

“Ribbit!”  The beady eyes of a fat green frog peeked out at them.

“Ugh!” Clara’s cheek’s flamed.  Utterly humiliated, she felt tears start to prickle in her eyes.  She peeked over at Yukiya, expecting to see some form of frustration, or disgust.

Instead, Yukiya put his palm out to the frog.  Clara blinked.  Was he…smiling?  It was almost nothing, but she swore she saw a tiny hint of a smile.

The frog hopped trustingly into Yukiya’s hand with a chirp.  “Wow,” Clara murmured. “You like him?”

Yukiya shrugged. “You made him.” Clara blinked, wondering what he meant by that, when Yukiya stood up.  “Let’s take him over to the river.”

* * *

The happy frog gave a chirrup of thanks before splashing off into the water.  Yukiya sat down by the riverbank, in a patch of grass, laying down in the shade of a tree. 

“Um, Y-Yukiya?”

“Hmm?”

“What about the lesson?”

“Lesson?”

Clara stared.  Had he already forgotten?  _Yukiya, sometimes it’s like you’re off in another world…_ For some reason, instead of feeling offended, she only felt a mild bemusement.

“The magic lesson,” she reminded him gently.

“Oh. Right.”  Yukiya sat up.  “When you’re casting a spell, what are you thinking about?”

“T-thinking about?” Clara frowned.  “Nothing at all, really.”  Most of the time she just cast, and then hoped. 

Yukiya reached down and plucked a dandelion flower from the ground.  He held it out to her.

“Try to visualize the result of the spell when you cast,” he instructed quietly as she took the flower.  “Close your eyes, concentrate, and visualize what you want to happen. And _then_ cast the spell.”

“O-okay…” Clara gave the flower’s tiny yellow petals a nervous stroke before she took out her wand.  Laying the flower down on the grass, she pointed the wand at it.

Then she closed her eyes, and began to picture it gently wafting in the breeze. It was a beautiful day, the grass soft and vibrant, the river babbling kindly in the background, and the occasional breeze settling warm upon her skin.  On this type of day, she imagined, the dandelion would float gently in the wind, like a feather on the water.  Effortlessly. Peacefully. 

And she as spoke the words of the incantation, she felt suffused with that peace, here under the warm sun, on a beautiful day, with Yukiya by her side.

“Look,” Yukiya prompted.

She opened her eyes.  And the flower was floating before her, wavering slightly in the air, just as she’d imagined.

“I did it!” she cheered, and it promptly fell to the ground.  “Aww...”

“It’s a good start,” Yukiya said, eyes narrowing approvingly. “I knew you could do it.”

 “Thanks, Yukiya.  I…um…” Clara turned to face him, and suddenly was at a loss for words. He was watching at her intently, gaze focused on her face.  As she watched, the focus of his gaze drifted, from her eyes to her nose to her mouth, where it stayed for a few moments.  Coloring, she dropped her gaze and looked away, unsettled by how she suddenly felt.  Her heart was suddenly beating so hard and quickly that she wondered if he could hear it.

To her relief, Yukiya recovered first and stood, gesturing back in the direction of her home.  “We’ll practice more when we’re back,” he said, and she could do nothing but nod in acquiescence and follow.

* * *

In the days that followed, they continued.  Yukiya would come in the morning and share breakfast, sometimes bringing gifts that he’d collected in the wild.  A little satchel filled with wild berries that Clara had sprinkled over pancakes, or a few yams that they later mashed and roasted with marshmallows.  Wolfy would accompany him, and watch them judgmentally from the corner while he enjoyed gnawing on a bone.

Then Clara would see her morning patients, and Yukiya would return, and they’d work on magic together in the afternoons.  He’d guide her for a while, and then leave her to practice while he busied himself outside. She’d emerge from her work to find that her garden had been newly weeded, or that a broken section of the fence had suddenly been fixed.  One day she saw him installing a hummingbird feeder, carefully piping in sugar water, and she laughed in delight later that afternoon when the first jewel-toned visitors arrived, wings buzzing with excitement.

As the little birds cheerfully partook of the sugary offering, their voices high in excitement, Clara threw her arms around Yukiya and hugged him.  And then, realizing what she was doing, she jerked back, blushing hotly and apologizing.  Turned away bashfully, she didn’t see the longing in Yukiya’s eyes, and perhaps she would not have recognized it.

All she knew was that she was inexplicably, wonderfully, helplessly drawn to him.  And she was terrified of the day he would disappear.


	3. Chapter 3

“So, tell me about your boyfriend,” Fran, the baker’s daughter, prompted one morning.

“W-what?”  Clara jumped, cheeks flushing red.  “What you are talking about?”

Fran rolled her eyes.  “You’re clearly shopping for two,” she pointed out, gesturing to Clara’s assembled purchases on the checkout counter.  Two hot butter rolls, two loaves of raisin bread, two apple tarts. Clara groaned.  Fran smiled brightly.  “I heard he’s rather mysterious.  Have you seen under his eyepatch?  What’s the big secret?”

Clara frowned.  She had never thought to ask, assuming it was something that Yukiya would share if he ever felt comfortable. Granted, Yukiya did not share much about himself as a general rule.  But what he gave her was his time, and the patient care that went into her magical tutoring, and the steady reliability when he set his mind to fixing something around her house. What more could she ask for? “I don’t see a reason to bother him about that,” Clara replied.

Fran sighed. “How boring.” And then she grinned wickedly.  “But you didn’t deny that’s he’s your boyfriend!  That’s a start.”

“W-What – n-no!”  Clara groaned.  “I-It’s not like that!”

Fran laughed.  But then her expression grew sober.  “Seriously though, Clara…where is he from?  And what’s he doing here?  People keep seeing him at your place, but he never talks to anyone in town. It’s…weird.”

“I…” Clara hesitated.  “I don’t know where he’s from.”

Fran scowled, wrapping the butter rolls with a little more force than necessary. “You mean he just showed up on your doorstep one day and you took him in?”  She groaned.  “ _Clara._ You can’t just take in strange men.”

“But he needed help,” Clara replied, confused.  “And Yukiya is a kind person.  He’s always helping me.”

“I heard he won’t give anyone else the time of day,” Fran muttered.  “People are starting to wonder what’s wrong with him. And that creepy wolf doesn’t help either.”  She placed the breads into Clara’s basket.  “There you go.”

“Thanks,” Clara murmured, getting ready to leave.

“Be careful,” Fran warned.  “You know how it is in the village. If they don’t get answers, they’ll start making things up.”

* * *

When Clara returned home, Yukiya was nowhere to be seen.  She sighed disappointedly, but opened her magic book and began to practice on her own. Yukiya had identified one of Clara’s main problems as a lack of concentration.  “Your thoughts are like a butterfly,” he’d mused.  But she now understood that to control magic she had to concentrate on channeling, until it became so habitual that the effort was second nature.

It wasn’t quite there yet.  But she would try.  She didn’t want to disappoint Yukiya, after all the time he’d spent with her.

With her wand in hand, she focused on an object on the other side of the room – a little rubber ball.  Envisioning the path of the ball, she lifted it with her magic, guiding it until it was over the keys of the piano nearby.

Then, with her magic, she used the ball to press a sequence of piano keys, starting with a simple ascending C major scale, the staccato notes playful and choppy.  On the descent, she had the ball roll over the keys instead, applying force to slur the notes. 

It was a simple exercise, but it was already giving her a headache.  As if in response to her fragmenting concentration, the ball began to roll onto the black keys, creating a dissonant mishmash of sharps and flats.

“Ugh!”  Clara shook her head in frustration, and the ball rolled to the ground.

Then there was a knock on the door.

Clara froze.  It wasn’t Yukiya’s gentle knock, but something more authoritative, almost pushy.  It sounded again – crisp and demanding.

“Y-Yes?” she ventured, hesitantly.

There was a pause.  “Are you going to open the door?”

Clara gulped.  That was not a friendly voice.  She moved to the door and then opened it a crack, peering out hesitantly.

The face that stared back at her could have belonged to a prince.  It was so unbelievably handsome that Clara almost couldn’t look away.  But the violet eyes were cold, and they narrowed, taking in Clara’s wrinkled day dress.  “Are you Clara Hart?”

“Y-Yes,” she stuttered.  Why was it that she’d only met this guy for about five seconds, and she already felt like she’d done something very wrong?  “C-Can I help you?”

“I’m looking for a friend,” the young man answered, unsmiling. “Some people in town said you might know him.”

“Oh…” Clara blinked.  “Who’s your friend?”

“His name is Yukiya Reizen.”

Clara blinked.  “You’re a friend of Yukiya?”  Suddenly she broke into a grin, unreasonably happy. A friend of Yukiya!  Yukiya had a friend!  He wasn’t all alone!

“Y-Yes.  Why are you grinning like that?”  The man scowled at her, and suddenly Clara felt like a very small insect.  “You’re kind of weird, you know?”

 _Yukiya is friends with this guy?  He’s kind of mean…_ Clara swallowed nervously.  _But any friend of Yukiya’s is a friend of mine, so…_ “Would you like to come in? We can sit and talk. I have some cookies.”

“Well, okay.  I’ll come in for a bit.”  He’d sounded reluctant, but Clara could have sworn there was a gleam of interest in his eyes. 

* * *

Her visitor turned out to be Elias Goldstein.  One of _the_ Goldsteins. 

Clara felt grossly inadequate, entertaining what amounted to magical royalty in her tiny, cluttered kitchen.  But if Elias was unimpressed by the humble surroundings he made no mention of it, choosing instead to brood silently as Clara prepared a pot of tea to go with the cookies. 

“S-So…how do you know Yukiya?” Clara ventured, still somewhat intimidated by that glare.  A glare which was now leveled in her direction. 

“He was my roommate.”

“O-oh?” Clara blinked.  “Roommate?  Where?”

“At Gedonelune Royal Magic Academy.”

“W-WHAT?!”  Clara stared at Elias in shock.  Yukiya had been a student _there_ , of all places?  And he’d never said anything!

_Yukiya, you’ve been totally holding out on me!_

Elias was watching her with a perplexed, mildly irritated expression.  Clara was beginning to think that mild irritation was Elias’ default state.  “What’s with the dramatic reaction?”

“W-Well,” Clara admitted.  “He’s been tutoring me in magic to help me get into that school. But he never said anything about being a student there himself!”

“Oh, right.  I heard about you from the other villagers.  The novice wizardess who can’t do anything except talk to animals right?”

“H-Hey!” 

Elias cocked an eyebrow.  “…Am I wrong?”

 _Ugh!_ “Well, no, but…” _Did he have to make it sound so pathetic?_

Elias shrugged, looking uninterested.  “Anyway, I’m not surprised that Yukiya didn’t say anything. But what is he doing here?”

They were interrupted by another knock on the door.  This time, Clara grinned in recognition at the sound, rushing over to open it.  She smiled, seeing Yukiya’s familiar one-eyed gaze.

“Clara,” he greeted, his voice soft.  “I thought I heard – Elias?”

To Clara’s surprise, as he stood, the expression on Elias’s face relaxed into something approaching affability. “Hey, Yukiya.  Long time.”

“Yeah, long time,” Yukiya replied. “What are you doing here?”

“Looking for you.  Some villagers pointed me this way.”

“I see…”

Yukiya turned back to her and pushed something into her hands gently. “Oh!  Thank you!” she exclaimed. It was a sunflower. The bloom was dried out and browned, with most of the petals fallen, but Clara examined it and saw the plump, striped seeds looking ready to burst from the flowerhead, and immediately grinned. “Looks delicious!”

“Yeah. I’ll help you with them.”

“Great!” Cheered by the prospect of freshly roasted sunflower seeds, Clara rushed off, sunflower in hand, to find a big bowl for the seeds.  As she rummaged through the cabinets, she heard Elias approach Yukiya.

“…is there something going on between you two?”

Clara’s cheeks flamed.  Elias had lowered his voice, but she had still heard every word.

“It’s not like that. You know it’s impossible,” came Yukiya’s flat reply.

As if a snake had wrapped itself around her chest and squeezed, Clara’s heart constricted painfully, and she almost gasped out loud at the ache.  Instead, she bit her lip, and shuffled some pans around, to maintain her pretense.  _Impossible,_ he’d said.  Why did that make her feel like she’d been hurt, as if by a thousand needles?

“It’s just…” Elias’ voice held a note of surprise. “I’ve never seen you talk to a girl before, much less give her a present.”

“She’s been cooking for me…so I try to help her out.”

 _Of course_ , Clara thought. _He’s just helping me, and doing all these things because he’s a nice person. It’s nothing special._ She suddenly found herself blinking away a tear. _I always knew that he was a nice person, no matter what he said._

“Clara?”

Yukiya’s voice reached her suddenly and she jumped. She was still wobbling, a little off-balance, when a strong hand closed around her arm to steady her.  At the contact, she gasped and instinctively flinched in surprise. 

Yukiya snatched his hand away. “Sorry,” he muttered, and she wondered if she was imagining the hint of hurt in his gaze.  “You were taking a while, and I wanted to see if you were okay.”

Hurriedly masking her own distress, she plastered on a bright smile. _A nice person,_ she repeated to herself. _That’s all._ “I’m fine, Yukiya!  I just couldn’t find what I wanted.”  She held out a bowl with the flower resting in the center.  “Let’s get the seeds out.”

* * *

Despite Clara’s emotional unrest, it was a peaceful afternoon.  It turned out that Yukiya had actually collected several flowers ripe for harvest, so Elias joined them in freeing the seeds. 

“I’ve never done this before,” Elias was saying.  “It’s kind of…soothing.”

“After we get the seeds out, we soak them in salt water, and then tomorrow we’ll roast them,” Clara explained. 

“Can we coat them in chocolate?”

Clara blinked, not having expected that kind of question from Elias.  Elias suddenly flushed and looked away. “I mean – f-forget it.”

Clara giggled, unable to help herself.

“W-What are you laughing at?” Elias scowled at her and she squeaked, choking back the rest of her laughter.

“Elias really likes chocolate,” Yukiya interjected serenely.  “He’s probably got some in his pockets right now.”

“Y-Yukiya!” Elias stared at Yukiya with an expression of betrayal.

“What?” Yukiya replied, looking puzzled. “It’s true.”

“It’s okay, Elias,” Clara intervened.  “We can definitely do the chocolate!  It’ll be delicious.”  _Maybe Elias isn’t as tough as he acts,_ she thought, still giggling to herself secretly.  “By the way…Elias, why did you come all this way to find Yukiya? Is everything okay?”

Elias hesitated, looking at Yukiya as if unsure whether to answer.  Yukiya sat back, closing his eyes for a moment, and suddenly Clara thought he looked deeply sad.

“Yukiya left the academy a while ago,” Elias began slowly, as if choosing his words carefully. While he was addressing Clara, his gaze was pinned on Yukiya. “I didn’t know where he went…but I thought I’d find him and offer him a place to stay with me, if he didn’t have anywhere else to go.”

Yukiya’s expression had shuttered completely.

“Our family has a few properties,” Elias explained, looking a little embarrassed. “Not all of them are used. I know at least a couple of them that would be suited for your needs, Yukiya.”

Clara glanced curiously between the two of them.  There was something going on here, she instinctively sensed – but what?

“Elias,” Yukiya began with a heavy sigh. “I’m okay.”

“Yeah,” Elias nodded. “I didn’t know before, but I can see that now, since you’re here with Clara.  But…if you need anything…”

“Thank you,” Yukiya intoned softly, shooting Elias a look of gratitude.

Clara’s eyes filled with tears.  _They must be really good friends,_ she thought.  “How did you know to come here to find him?”

At that, Elias’s gaze shot back to Yukiya again.  Yukiya’s expression remained as blank as ever, but did she imagine it? Or had Yukiya very subtly shaken his head?

“Just a hunch,” Elias answered after a few moments.  “And a lot of searching spells.”

Clara’s frustration rose, but she bit her lip.  They couldn’t tell her, for some reason.  And it was okay, she reasoned.  She wasn’t really a friend of Yukiya’s, right?  Not like Elias.  She was just…well…

_“She’s been cooking for me…so I try to help her out.”_

That was it.

But she forced her expression to brighten.  “A searching spell?  That sounds really cool!  Can you teach me?”

Elias relaxed at the change of topic.  “Of course,” he began.  “It’s pretty simple.”  He explained the mechanics of the spell, and the incantation that would generate a beam of light leading the finder in the right direction.  Clara listened half-heartedly, trying to memorize the incantation, but still feeling uneasy.

_What’s wrong with Yukiya?  Is he okay?  And…why do I feel so miserable?_

“Clara?  Clara!” Elias tapped at the table in front of her, and she jumped.

“S-sorry!”

“Daydreaming even after you asked me to teach you?” Elias scowled. “Maybe that’s why you haven’t gotten an acceptance letter…Yukiya, is she like this with you?”

“Sometimes.”

“H-Hey!”

As Clara looked in Yukiya’s direction, she was shocked to see that he was smiling at her, just a bit.  _Yukiya’s smile…I’ve never seen it before,_ she thought dazedly. It was calm and kind, and it made her feel warm.  He smiled less with his mouth than with his eyes – she could almost feel it, like the soft wisps of air from a secret whispered against her ear.

“Are you ready to try it?” Elias demanded, once again interrupting her thoughts.

“Um…s-sure.”   

Elias withdrew a handkerchief from his pocket. “Let’s keep it simple,” he suggested. “Go outside and cast the spell on my handkerchief.  It should just lead straight back into the house to me. Very basic.”

“O-okay.”  _What was the incantation again?_

“I’ll go with her,” Yukiya suddenly stood.  “In case she needs help.”

Elias raised his eyebrow meaningfully but nodded in acquiescence. 

* * *

Outside, Clara withdrew her wand and took a breath.  But as she tried to recall the words of the incantation, her mind came up utterly blank.  Her cheeks flushed in embarrassment.

“Need a reminder?” Yukiya prompted gently.  And he leaned over, and spoke the words into Clara’s ear, very softly.

Clara shuddered, as his breath tickled at her skin.  Her heart was beating so quickly that she could feel her own pulse fluttering at her neck, and her body grew hot.  Suddenly, it felt like time had slowed, and she had become suspended in this moment. The world narrowed, and there was nothing that existed but the two of them – and the sound of the words, spoken in Yukiya’s gentle, low voice, against her ear.

“You can do it, Clara,” Yukiya continued.  His hand came to rest on the top of her head, stroking her hair, and she suddenly felt like a very beloved cat, wanting to close her eyes and purr.  “Just remember to concentrate.”

He withdrew his hand, and stepped back.  The spell was broken.  Clara shook herself, trying desperately to recover the shreds of her concentration that she would need for this spell.

_Yukiya believes in me.  I can’t disappoint him!_

So she readied her wand, and clutched Elias’ handkerchief in her other hand.  She took a deep breath, sharpening her focus only to the task at hand. 

“Show a path to those who seek! Duko Finis Intinerith!”

Light flowed from Clara’s wand, swirling around the handkerchief.   _Keep concentrating,_ Clara thought furiously, channeling her magic. And then, a few moments later, a weak beam of light shot out of the handkerchief leading into the house.

Clara stared at it.  “Did it…work?”  And then she gave a great whoop of joy, throwing her arms into the air.  “I did it!  I did it!  Yukiya, look – “ She turned to him.

He was smiling again.  But this time, there was nothing hidden about it – it was a full, radiant, true smile.  Clara’s heart ached – he looked so unbelievably handsome and good, smiling at her as if - as if -

_Yukiya…if I got to see your smile every day…I would do anything._

And then, with sudden clarity, she knew.

She was in love with him. And it was hopeless, because – he’d said it himself – it was _impossible_ , and he didn’t love her back.


	4. Chapter 4

In novels and storybooks, love was a force that could unite enemies and transcend all obstacles, so Clara had always thought that love would be a pleasant and happy feeling. But in reality, Clara had found, it was much harsher, an unforgiving obsession that lingered stubbornly even when thwarted.  Now, it seemed to wreak havoc with her life, her emotions – and her magic.

“Try again,” Yukiya prompted.

 _How can he be so patient?_ Clara wondered.  The afternoon’s lesson had yielded a shower of frogs, a shrieking plant, and a flock of butterflies that had once been pencils.  Elias had disappeared at some point after the frogs, half-disgusted and half-intrigued by the sheer illogicality of her magic.  But Yukiya would just look her in the eye, coaxing her to do it again, because she wouldn’t improve without practicing.  Her heart would race, and she would look away and flush, and her spellcasting would be as scattered as ever. There was no way she could concentrate on anything, much less magic.

“C-Could we take a break?” she pleaded.  

Yukiya sat back.  “Of course.  You’ve been working hard all day.”

Clara felt terribly guilty.  _How can he be so nice?_ “T-thanks, Yukiya…S-Sorry I’m such a failure.”

He reached out to pat her head again, and she flinched away.  Startled, he froze with his hand in mid-air, and then dropped it to his side.

“Umm…” she fidgeted. “Maybe we can go outside for a bit?”

“All right.  The fresh air will help you relax.”

 _No,_  Clara thought,  _probably not._   But she didn’t argue, and followed him outside.

* * *

He led her through the woods to the river, and she sank down against the bank.  Yukiya sat a couple of feet away leaning back against a grassy incline.

They said nothing for a moment, and Clara’s thoughts grew more and more agitated.   _What do I do?  Should I tell him?  But what if he says –_ she didn’t want to think about it any further, and squeezed her eyes shut.

“Clara?”

She jerked.  “Y-Yes?”

“…Is everything okay?”

Clara flushed.   _Stop acting like a fool!  It isn’t his fault you had to go and fall in love with him…_ “U-um, e-everything’s f-fine!”

“…Are you sure?”

Clara sighed.  She wasn’t fooling anyone.  “No…”

“What’s wrong?”  

_I need to tell him.  But what if he – no, I can’t!_

She floundered about for the first thing that came to mind.  “W-Why didn’t you tell me you went to Gedonelune Royal Magic Academy?”

“You never asked.”

“O-oh…” Typical Yukiya logic. She couldn’t really argue with it.  “Well, maybe you can tell me a little about what it’s like there?” Anything to distract her from the feelings roiling in her chest.

There was a pause as Yukiya considered this.  “All right. What would you like to know?”

“Umm…how about the classes?”

Yukiya nodded.  “Each grade is divided into four classes, and you take all your lessons with your class. There are lessons on many different topics.” He glanced at Clara. “I think you’d like the magical creatures and magical plants classes.”

Clara sighed.  “Sounds like so much fun,” she murmured enviously. “Are there a lot of magical creatures around school?”

“A few.  Wing rabbits, Carbuncles, firefly owls.  And there’s a spring in the woods where unicorns are rumored to live.”

“Unicorns?!”  Clara gasped.  “Have you ever seen a unicorn, Yukiya?”

“No,” he answered. “They’re rare.”

“Aww.”  Clara smiled, despite herself, enjoying the conversation. “What are the grounds like?”

“There are two dormitories, for boys and girls. There are some gardens, and a lake, and a greenhouse with a lot of magical plants.”  He paused. “Once a month you get to leave school and explore the town of Gedonelune, too.  There’s a busy street with a lot of shops.”

“Is it a big town?”

“Yeah. Much bigger than here.”

Clara’s heart tightened in yearning.  She had to work harder so she could get in…she had to put this all behind her.  That way, she could see all of this for herself.   _Yukiya…_ she sighed.  He was so kind to help her, but ultimately it was up to her, right?

“Are you feeling a little better?”

She glanced over at Yukiya, and he was staring at her intensely.  Immediately she blushed.

“Y-Yeah,” she muttered. Wanting to regain control of her emotions, she tried to steer the conversation back. “Um, what’s your favorite place, Yukiya?”

There was a period of silence, and she glanced back over to him.  He was staring up at the sky.  “The ocean,” he finally answered. “There’s a park in town…and I found a trail that leads to the sea.”

Clara closed her eyes, trying to envision a picture she’d seen of the seashore.  “What’s it like? I’ve never been there before.”

Yukiya’s eyes softened. “The water shimmers, stretching into the horizon.  And there’s the sound of waves rolling against the sand.  It’s…soothing.”  Suddenly, Yukiya reached into his pocket, and withdrew something.  “Here.”

“Hmm?” Clara blinked. Yukiya was holding a white seashell for her to take.  She accepted it, tracing the shape of the shell with her fingers.  “It’s so pretty…”

“Hold it up to your ear,” Yukiya suggested.  Clara did, and then to her surprise, she heard a distant echo.  She broke into a grin.

“That’s so cool! Is that what the ocean sounds like?”

“Yeah.”

“Wow…” Clara placed the shell next to her ear again. It was a far-off rushing sound that was nevertheless steady and calming.  Yukiya gazed at her quietly, and reluctantly, she drew away from the seashell, and held it out back to him.  

To her surprise, he shook his head.  “You can keep it.”

Clara’s face reddened, and her heart suddenly began pounding quickly.  “W-What?  No, I can’t do that!”  She pushed the shell back at him, but he steadied her arms, and then put it back into her hands.

“It’s okay,” he insisted. “Keep it.”  

“Yukiya…” Clara sighed. “Thank you.”  With some degree of melancholy, she looked down at the shell. It was so beautiful, the pearly white shell giving way to a lovely pink interior when you turned it over.  “I’ll cherish it.”

* * *

By the time they returned to her home, it was almost sunset, and the sky shone brilliantly red and gold. Usually, Yukiya stayed and helped her prepare dinner before they shared a meal together, but this time, after she entered the home, he lingered outside by the door.

“Are you going to come in, Yukiya?”

He shook his head briefly. “I should probably go talk to Elias.”

Disappointed, she gave him a smile nonetheless.  “O-okay. I’ll see you tomorrow, then.”

She expected him to depart, but to her surprise, he remained there, watching her.

“Clara,” he called. “You don’t have to fake a smile.”

“W-What?” she grimaced.

“I know you’re unhappy.”

To her surprise, she felt a wave of anger.   _Easy for him to say!  He doesn’t trust me…he can’t love me…and now he wants me to be happy?_ But she said nothing.  

“Clara?” he prompted again, gently.  “What’s wrong? Are you afraid of my curse?”

“What…” Clara was stunned by the question.  “No! That’s not it!  You’re talking nonsense!”

Yukiya looked away momentarily. “I just want you to speak honestly.  I’m used to it.”

She hesitated, and then plunged ahead.  “Let me ask you this.  Why did you leave the academy?  Why did you come here?”

She knew him well enough by now to pick up the subtleties of his expression, to sense when he was happy, or concerned, or confused.  But now his expression seemed to close, becoming devoid of all nuance.

“It’s none of your concern,” he answered. Clara was stunned by how cold and harsh those words sounded. It was as if her body had suddenly gone cold, too – her fingers felt numb, and her mind curiously detached from her mouth, which continued to speak – as if she had no control over the words tumbling forth.

“What do you mean, none of my concern? It is my concern!” She gasped for breath, suddenly overwrought. “Because I love you!”

The words seemed to suspend in the air, echoing in her mind, taunting her. In shock at her own temerity, her hands crept up to cover her mouth. In the silence that followed, she could make out a stunned look on Yukiya’s normally calm face.

It seemed like they were frozen there for an eternity.  

And then Yukiya turned away.

“I’m sorry.  But it won’t work out.”

With those parting words still ringing in Clara’s ears, Yukiya walked away.  And Clara could only stare after his retreating figure in crushed silence, until she finally staggered back into her house.

 _If this is love,_ she thought,  _then let me be a stone._

* * *

By the next morning, she had resolved to smile again.  It was a vow she’d made to herself, once, after her parents had passed away, that she had to face each new day with a smile, no matter what cruel and terrible things happened.  It was the only way to move forward.

So when an authoritative knock sounded on her door, Clara took a deep breath, and prepared to greet Elias with a cheerful smile and the offer of a freshly baked muffin.  Elias, of course, didn’t refuse, but was as harsh as always in his observations.  “You look terrible today.  What’s wrong with you?”

Clara hesitated, not knowing whether to feign innocence and be ridiculed for lying, or to confess the whole sordid affair and make the situation really, really awkward. She settled for something in between. “Yukiya and I…had an argument last night.”

Elias frowned. “Yukiya argues?”  Then he seemed to come to a realization and blushed. “Y-You mean – a l-l-lover’s quarrel?”

Clara’s cheeks burned, the denial rising instinctively.  “N-no! It’s not like that!”  And then she sighed. “We aren’t a couple.  I know for certain.”

Elias shifted uncomfortably, his eyes flickering towards the door as if looking for an escape route. “U-um, I’m s-sorry,” he muttered, clearly not knowing what else to say.

“It’s okay,” Clara sighed. “But I still want to see him and make sure he’s okay.”

“I haven’t seen him,” Elias admitted.  “And he’s usually on time for your lesson.”

Clara looked away sadly. “I was afraid he’d avoid me.”

Elias’ expression grew sober.  “I’m surprised at Yukiya – he normally isn’t so petty.”  He straightened in his chair.  “In any case, I can help you today.”  He paused.  “ _If_  you don’t summon any more frogs!”

Clara winced.  “Aww…I couldn’t help it!”

They got to work, using Elias’ Grimoire to identify spells for Clara to practice.  If she’d been embarrassed while in front of Yukiya, it was nothing compared to Elias, who glowered unendingly.

“I don’t understand,” Elias spat, after half an hour of failed attempts.  “Were you dropped on the head as a baby?  Does your magic  _ever_ work?”

Just then, there was a scratching noise at the door.  Clara stood to open it, revealing a large Doberman holding carrying a puppy by the scruff of its neck.  The mother dog carefully climbed up onto Clara’s table, depositing her puppy before her.

“Can you help my pup?” the Doberman woofed.  

“It hurts!” the puppy squeaked.

As Elias watched with interest, Clara stroked the puppy soothingly.  “Where does it hurt, little one?”

The pup held up one paw. “I hurt it after I fell down the stairs!”

The mother dog sighed. “We’re still working on stairs. It’s hard when they’re so small.”

Clara gently examined the wound.  Luckily the sprain seemed superficial, but it was always painful for animals to hurt one of their limbs.  She grabbed her wand and cast the familiar mending spell.  “O sacred wind, grant us a breeze and mend this wound. Sanatio Aura!”

A gentle wind surrounded the dogs, and the pup yipped in joy as the wound was healed.  In gratitude the puppy licked Clara’s hand.  “Be careful next time, okay?” Clara instructed. “I know stairs are hard at first, but soon you’ll be big enough that they’ll be no trouble at all.”

“Thank you!” the mother dog panted, before she scampered down the table elegantly.  The puppy, after a wobbling moment of hesitation, followed her. They came to Clara, rubbing themselves against her legs, tails wagging, and she scratched their ears.

“Well,” Elias muttered. “Guess your magic isn’t completely useless after all.”  He eyed the dogs, both crowding happily against Clara’s legs, and Clara had to laugh at the expression of jealousy in his face.

“You can pet them too,” Clara invited, and Elias moved closely, kneeling down.  The puppy climbed onto his lap immediately, and Elias stroked the tiny body with his fingers, ruffling behind its ears.

“I had a Doberman growing up,” Elias recalled quietly.  “His name was Rudolf.”

As Clara watched, the puppy reached forward to lick Elias’ nose.  In surprise, Elias fell back onto his rear, laughing.  Clara blinked.  It was the first time she’d seen Elias laugh.

The door suddenly opened.

“Y-Yukiya!” Clara exclaimed in surprise.  He was very, very late compared to when he usually came over.  And given what had happened between them, she’d thought he wouldn’t come back at all…

Yukiya’s one-eyed gaze moved over them, taking in the sight of Clara and Elias, and the dogs. Something seemed to darken within his expression.  Elias turned red and stood, although not before gently depositing the puppy on the ground near its mother.  

“Y-Yukiya,” he said, sounding nervous.  “I-It’s not what it looks like! I w-wouldn’t…w-we were just…”

Yukiya shook his head, and Elias fell quiet.  Clara stood gradually, but she didn’t know what to say.  The two dogs seemed to sense the disquiet, and the mother dog licked Clara’s hand one more time in a gesture of farewell before slipping out the door, followed by the happy pup.

The silence was finally broken by Yukiya himself.  “Sorry I’m late.”  

Then as she approached him, Clara gasped.  “Yukiya...”

He didn’t look well.  His skin was pale, and he was sweating. Though he seemed to be standing, Clara realized that he was clutching at the door tightly.

She instinctively moved towards him, her hand reaching out towards his forehead to check for signs of fever, but he managed to avoid her touch.  Hurt, Clara withdrew, but she couldn’t help worrying.  “Yukiya, you don’t look well!  What’s wrong?”

Yukiya shook his head. “I-I’m fine…”

“This doesn’t look like fine!” Clara exclaimed, and then turned to Elias.  “Elias…can you help him?”

But Elias looked completely unsurprised.  “Yukiya… What do you need?”

“N-Nothing,” Yukiya said through gritted teeth.  “I’ll be okay…”

And then he suddenly grimaced, flinching as if he’d been struck.  Losing his hold on the door, Yukiya suddenly collapsed to the ground.

“Yukiya!” Clara cried out, rushing forward and managing to shield him from hitting the floor with his head.

In her arms, he was breathing hard, but his eyes were closed.  Clara trembled.  “Elias,” she begged. “Would you help me move him to my room?  He can rest there.”

“Of course.” With care, Elias slung his arm around Yukiya’s shoulders, and together they moved him to the bedroom.

* * *

“What’s wrong with him?” Clara gently smoothed her palm over Yukiya’s forehead.  “He’s burning up!”

Elias said nothing, looking away.  Clara looked back at the sleeping Yukiya, whose brow was creased in anguish, and wanted to sob in frustration. “Please, Elias!  I know you guys have some kind of secret, but I need to help him!”

“All right,” Elias finally said.  “I can’t tell you everything.  It’s Yukiya’s story to tell.  But…” he took a breath.  “This isn’t the first time.  At school, this happened to Yukiya every month.”

“W-What?  Every month?!”  Clara’s heart tightened in sympathy.   _Poor Yukiya…_

“It’s going to get a little worse before it gets better,” Elias continued.  “But this is the most important thing –  _do not remove his eyepatch on the night of the full moon_.”

“G-Got it!” Clara nodded fiercely.  She’d never planned on doing that without Yukiya’s consent anyway.  

“In the meantime…” Elias frowned.  “You take care of him here.  I’ll see if I can find some Morning Dew Weed in town.”  

“Here!”  Clara rushed over to the cabinet and withdrew a glowing bottle. Elias blinked in shock. “Is that -  _glowcap oil?”_

Clara nodded.  

“Clara...” Elias frowned. “This is a really valuable magical reagent. My brother would love to get his hands on some - “ He stopped mid-sentence, shaking his head.  “No time for that.”

“Take it and trade it for the Morning Dew Weed, okay?” Clara returned to Yukiya’s bedside. “Get enough so that we can help him, please!”

Elias nodded resolutely, and headed out the door.

Beside her, Yukiya was shivering despite his fever. Clara grabbed a washcloth from nearby, and began to gently wipe at his face.  

 _How long has he been like this?_ She shuddered.   _I’m glad he came by. If he were suffering alone, that would be terrible!_

She wiped the towel along his neck and then hesitated, face suddenly turning red.   _I need to take off his shirt,_ she realized.   _He’s soaked through.  But…_  She groaned in embarrassment.  With fumbling fingers, she unbuttoned the shift, revealing a well-defined masculine chest.

 _Don’t look!  Don’t look!_ Clara squeezed her eyes shut, and then used the towel to wipe at his chest.   _Sorry, Yukiya!_

“Clara…”

Her eyes flew open.  The next thing she knew, Yukiya had thrown his arm around her, and was holding her close. Clara’s cheeks flushed and she struggled instinctively, but then Yukiya murmured her name again, and she subsided against his bare chest.  Instead, she reached up to gently stroke his face.

“Clara…I…I didn’t want you to know.”

“W-what?”  Clara gasped, turning towards Yukiya’s face.  “Yukiya…” But he had fallen asleep again.  The words made her squeeze her eyes shut in hurt. Even now, he was trying to shut her out. But what was important now was that he was ill, and that she needed to make sure he recovered.  

It didn’t matter what he decided after that.  She would never regret taking care of him, never regret loving him.

She stayed with him, in his arms, until Elias finally returned with the Morning Dew Weed. After Elias got over his embarrassed shock at seeing them together, he helped Clara brew it into a tea, and Clara helped Yukiya drink it down, stroking at his throat to encourage him to swallow.  When Yukiya had managed to down a whole cup, Clara decided to stay with him while Elias retired for the night.

She continued to cool his forehead and wipe him down, relieved that he seemed to be in less pain. As night fell, she rested against him, tucking her head onto his shoulder.  He shifted at one point, encircling her shoulder with his arm, drawing her close once more.  

 _Is this what it feels like to be with someone you love?_ Clara stroked Yukiya’s other forearm sadly.   _It must be wonderful._ She swallowed a pang of longing, and then peered up at Yukiya’s face.  He looked peaceful, and she couldn’t help but smile sadly at the sight.

She lay there in his arms, until she finally fell asleep.  


	5. Chapter 5

_The house smelled of sickness._

_They needed fresh air, Clara thought.  She wasn’t quite tall enough to reach the window, so she had to climb the counter.  Once on top, she grasped and tugged the glass pane open by inches. The first gust of winter wind took her by surprise, the icy breeze swirling deep into her lungs and around the kitchen._

_“Clara….” The call was weak and distant, but Clara jolted._

_“Mom!” She jumped back down onto the ground, wincing at the hard landing, before she took off running into her parents’ bedroom.  Mom and Dad had both gone to bed uncharacteristically early. It was the first time she’d heard from them in several hours._

_The minute Clara crossed the threshold, she froze, mute with shock._

_Whereas he’d been laughingly complaining of a sore throat that same morning, her father now lay unmoving on the bed, skin pale and waxy as a doll.  Her mother was hunched over him, face flushed with fever and fighting back shivers even as her own skin gleamed with sweat._

_“Mom!”  Clara started to run to them, but her mother thrust a hand out to stop her._

_“No!  Don’t get any closer, sweetheart….”  Her mother shuddered, dissolving into a fit of coughs._

_Stuck in place near the door, Clara reached out a trembling hand towards them. “Mom, what’s wrong?  Please….”_

_Her mother turned to smile at her, gaze full of love and reassurance, even as her limbs shivered.  “Go find the herbalist, Clara.  Dad’s not feeling too well, and I…could use some rest.”_

_“Okay! I’ll go get Grandma Ellie right away!  Hold on, Mom!”_

_The plague epidemic had hit the village hard and fast, appearing just earlier this week. It seemed to target people at random. Perfectly healthy adults had been just as susceptible as the elderly and the young.  But even so, while some family members were struck dead within a day, others seemed to be spared for no reason at all._

_After grabbing her wool cloak, Clara opened the door and rushed into the night. The full moon illuminated her path, but even so she stumbled over the cobblestones as she ran.  The image of her mother’s form, hunched and sickly over the unmoving shape of her father under the blankets haunted her mind’s eye._

_If she didn’t run fast enough, they wouldn’t make it.  So she ran, and ran, and ran._

_But the path never ended._

* * *

Clara awoke with a start, heart racing and eyes filled with tears.  Next to her, Yukiya slept on.  She turned to stroke his forehead, and was relieved to find his skin feeling slightly cooler. She sat for a few moments, breathing deeply to banish the nightmare and its lingering effects, and then stood to begin her usual daily routines.

During the day, she let Yukiya rest, working quietly on a sewing project and then clearing an area in her garden that she hoped to plant with herbs. A mother duck stopped by at one point to converse with her and introduce her to its little ones, newly hatched, before they waddled off in a line on their way to a local pond. Later, Elias stopped by and they shared a light snack of tea and scones before he headed off to town, looking for the local bookstore.

By evening, she was beginning to worry.  Yukiya hadn’t awoken all day.  She peeked her head in to check on him and gasped at his flushed face. When she rushed over to press her hand to his forehead, it was burning hot.

“Oh no…”  Clara ran to the kitchen, retrieving a bucket of cool water and some cloths. Yukiya groaned as she lay the first cloth on his head, but didn’t awaken.  She began cooling his neck and chest, this time too frantic to be embarrassed.  How had this happened so quickly again? The fever was even worse than before, and as she worked, despair began to set in.

 _It’s no use_ , she fretted.   _If only I had better magic… if I could only heal people. Instead, I’m a failure of a wizardess who can’t cast any real spells._  She stroked Yukiya’s flushed cheek.   _I can’t even help the one I love. Why am I so useless?!_

She scanned the room frantically, and her gaze fell upon the cabinet in the corner.  And she remembered. She’d given Elias a jar of glowcap oil, and he’d returned with an herb that would help reduce fevers. Morning Dew Weed.

“Just wait, Yukiya,” she promised.  “I’ll be right back!”

Gathering her cloak around her shoulders, she grabbed a jar of the glowing oil and then rushed out the door.

The sun had long since set, and evening had given way to night. A full moon had risen, illuminating the cobblestones, but the once-familiar shape of the trees appeared suddenly sinister. Clara shivered – it was her nightmare come to life.  But this time she was determined to succeed.  _I’ll save Yukiya_ , she thought fiercely to herself, as she broke into a run.  She clutched the jar of glowcap oil tightly, her ears filled with the pounding of her own footsteps. Soon her lungs were burning, and her eyes filled with tears from exertion.

It was a path she’d traversed easily every day. In the light of day this road was nothing but a peaceful stroll, but now it felt like she’d been running for miles.  Her feet ached from the unyielding hardness of the cobblestones, and her hands were beginning to grow sore from clutching the jar, when she caught sight of the lights on the horizon.  Finally, the town.

When she reached the herbalist’s storefront, she banged on the door, calling loudly for the old woman who worked there.  “Grandma Ellie!  Grandma Ellie!”

After a few minutes, the door opened, and the kindly old woman peered outside.  “Clara?  My dear, what’s wrong?”

“I need some Morning Dew Weed.  Please!”

An expression of confusion passed over the old woman’s face.  “Calm down, my dear.  Come inside, and tell me what’s wrong.”

As Clara entered the darkened storefront, she noticed another person inside. To her surprise, it was Fran, and from the looks of the dinner table, she had come over to Grandma Ellie’s for dinner.

“Clara!” Fran called out, rushing over.  “What’s going on?”

Clara trembled.  “It’s Yukiya.  He’s sick!  I need some herbs to help him!”

“Slow down, my child.  Who’s Yukiya, and what’s wrong with him?” Grandma Ellie began pouring Clara a cup of herbal tea, but Clara shook with impatience.

“He’s my friend.  He came to town a couple of weeks ago and is helping me with magic, but he fell really sick yesterday with a fever and it’s gotten worse.”  Clara gasped for breath, feeling her chest seizing in anxiety as tears filled her eyes.  “I need some Morning Dew Weed to help him!  Here – “ She put the jar of oil on the table.  “I have this.  Please!”

Grandma Ellie frowned.  “His fever came upon him all of a sudden?”

“Yes.  He was just fine the day before!”

The old herbalist’s expression went solemn, and she was silent for a long moment.  When she spoke again it was very softly. “My dear… Is there any chance he could be sick with…”

Clara went cold. If they thought he was sick with  _that_ , he’d be run out of town faster than a criminal. “No!” she cried.  “It’s not the plague!  He’s fine! It’s just his curse!”

Fran blanched. Grandma Ellie gasped.

Realizing what she’d just revealed, Clara clapped her hands over her mouth in horror.

“Clara,” Fran sputtered.  “A c-curse?  What are you doing with him?  He could be a danger to the whole town!”

“No! It’s not like that!” Clara protested desperately.  “Yukiya just gets sick once a month!  That’s his curse!  I just need something to make him feel better until he’s okay again!  Please!”  A sob rose in her throat.  “Yukiya would never hurt anybody! He’s the nicest person! Please…”

Grandma Ellie sighed and hugged Clara close. It should have been comforting, but it reminded Clara all too much of when her parents had died and she’d found herself in the same old woman’s embrace.

“How about this?” Grandma Ellie mused. “We’ll come over with you and make sure he’s okay. He is from out of town.  We don’t know if he’s brought some kind of disease with him.  I certainly don’t want you getting sick too.”  She patted Clara on the head.  “Just a precaution.”

Fran looked nervous but she reached a hand to squeeze Clara’s shoulder.  “If it’s like you said, we’ve got nothing to worry about, right?”

“Okay,” Clara agreed, relief blossoming in her chest.   _He’ll be alright!_  “Please come with me and help Yukiya!”

Together, Clara and Fran helped hitch a donkey to Grandma Ellie’s cart while the herbalist collected the supplies she’d need.  Then they were off, the donkey trotting briskly along the path towards Clara’s home.

* * *

When they finally reached the house, Clara rushed over to Yukiya’s bedside.  Her heart contracted in fear as she watched Yukiya take slow, shallow breaths.  He wasn’t moving; he was barely breathing.  She barely heard the sounds of Fran and Grandma Ellie moving about her kitchen, preparing the Morning Dew Weed infusion.  Before she knew it, they were at her side, and Grandma Ellie was coaxing Yukiya to drink.  Then, when he’d managed to swallow most of the tea, the old woman set the cup aside, and began to examine him, pressing against his throat and taking his pulse.

 _Please be okay.…_  Clara prayed.  

Fran squeezed Clara’s hand.  “He’ll be fine,” she whispered, and Clara nodded.  Then Fran gave her a gentle smile.  “You really love him, don’t you?  I can see it in your eyes.”

“I just want him to get better.  He’s the nicest, kindest person I’ve ever met, and this isn’t fair, that he has to get sick every month.  I wish I could help him….” Clara’s fists clenched again.  _If only I were a better wizardess…._

They sat in silence while Grandma Ellie finished up her examination.  Then the old woman moved forward, clasping Clara’s arm.  “Fran, would you watch over him for a moment while I speak to Clara?”

“Of course,” Fran agreed, moving closer to Yukiya’s side. Clara stepped outside with Grandma Ellie into the coolness of the night.  Standing outside, she could hear crickets chirping from the woods nearby, and the occasional shuffle of the donkey waiting patiently.

Grandma Ellie sighed.  “I’m not an expert on magical conditions,” she began.  “But your young man’s curse is something very strange.  It’s not really the same as a normal fever. It’s almost like his body is trying to fight something unrelated, and the fever is just a side effect. Can you sense anything abnormal with your magic?”

“No.  I can’t.” Clara squeezed her eyes shut in shame. “But you know my magic, Grandma Ellie. It’s… useless.”

“Clara…”

“It’s true!” Clara clenched her fists.  “I wish I didn’t have such terrible magic! I couldn’t help anyone during the epidemic, and I can’t help Yukiya now!”  A tear rolled down her cheek.  “Yukiya was even helping me to study to get into Gedonelune Royal Magic Academy, and I can’t even thank him by helping him when he needs me.…”

“Clara,” Grandma Ellie rubbed her back.  “You’re doing everything you can.  If it’s like you said, he’ll feel better soon, right?  Then you’ll keep working together, and keep trying to get in. Once you get into the school, you can focus on learning how to help him.”

As Grandma Ellie spoke, the light of the full moon suddenly flooded out from behind a curtain of clouds, illuminating them and the house.  Clara could see the genuine warmth in the old herbalist’s expression, and she wrapped her arms around the woman in gratitude.

“You’re right,” she whispered.  “That’s what I have to focus on.  When Yukiya gets better, we’ll – “

And then from within the house, they heard a scream.

* * *

The scene inside nearly made Clara’s heart stop.  Fran was cowering on the ground near the bed. Before them, towering over Fran, was a huge magical creature covered in dark fur.  Sharp white fangs protruded from its mouth, and a pair of purple horns curved from his head.  His yellow gaze darted frantically around the room.

“It’s you,” Clara whispered.   _The magical beast from the river._  But where was Yukiya?

The beast suddenly thrashed its head, as if disoriented, and let out a cry.  Fran shook with fear.  “Clara… What kind of monster is this?!”

“It’s okay!  I know him! He’s not dangerous!”  Nevertheless, Clara jumped in front of Fran.  At the movement, the beast turned towards her.  Clara froze in place, as if pinned by the piercing yellow gaze.  “What happened, Fran?  Where did he come from?”

Fran whimpered.  “I…” She began to sob.  “I’m s-sorry! I just wanted to see what was under his eyepatch.…”

With a sinking heart, Clara noticed that next to Fran, Yukiya’s eyepatch lay discarded on the floor. She went cold, remembering Elias’ warning.

_This beast is Yukiya!  Yukiya’s curse…. This is what Elias was talking about! Then that means…_

She remembered the night she’d first seen him by the river, on the night of the blue moon. He’d been injured, undoubtedly running from the sheepdog that she’d later treated in her clinic. She’d called out to him, and he’d seemed to understand her. Yukiya, in beast form, must have been hungry even then, she thought, remembering his interest in the mushrooms. And when she’d fallen into the water, he must have followed her along the river, saved her, and then brought her back home.  

_I should have known! The beast was kind, and so is Yukiya…. I should have known!_

“Yukiya!” she called out.

At the sound of her voice, Yukiya suddenly roared.  Behind her, Grandma Ellie and Fran cringed, but Clara knew instinctively that he wasn’t trying to scare them.  Yukiya would never do that.

_I’m not afraid.  It’s Yukiya.  I’ll never be afraid of Yukiya._

She stood.  But as she began to run towards him, he reared up, towering over her. There was sheer panic in his gaze, and he let out another roar. Taken aback by the sound, Clara stumbled – and then Yukiya gathered himself and fled out the door.

“No… Yukiya! Stop! Come back!”  Tears began streaming down Clara’s face as she tried to follow him, ignoring the protests of her friends.  But he was too fast, and she quickly lost him in the darkness of the woods.  Gasping for breath, she sank to the ground.

It all made sense now. This was why Yukiya was alone, roaming from place to place.  Elias must have known, and it was why he’d come to offer his friend shelter. As to why Yukiya had left the academy, she didn’t know for sure, but it must have been related.  Something must have happened to him there.  And now…

As she stared into the darkness, there was a cold certainty in her heart.  If she didn’t find him now, she would never see him again.

But how could she find him?

As she placed a hand in her pocket, she suddenly felt a familiar smooth object, and gasped.  Yukiya’s seashell.  That was it!  She could use the search spell!

Trembling, she withdrew her wand, clutching Yukiya’s shell tightly.  She took a few deep breaths, knowing that she had to concentrate or else it wouldn’t work.  On a whim, she raised the shell to her ear. Hearing the rushing sound of the ocean reverberating in the seashell’s tiny chamber, she felt a little more at ease, even as resolve filled her heart.

It had to work.  She couldn’t fail this time.  She wouldn’t.

In her mind, she pictured Yukiya as he’d been, the last time they’d done this spell together - his brilliant, rare smile, and the little whispery puffs of his breath that had ghosted across her skin as he’d reminded her of the incantation. She could remember each one of them now.

Clara raised her wand.

“Show a path to those who seek! Duko Finis Intinerith!”

She felt the draw of her magical power through the wand, and concentrated as it poured into the seashell.  Struggling to control it, she fed more power to it, coaxing the spell to take form.

With a flash of light, the shell began to glow and a beam of light pointed the way, deep into the forest.

* * *

It was a long journey.  Clara had started running, but as the woods thickened she could barely see anything.  She’d already fallen twice, and then she’d run straight into a large thorn bush.

“Ack!”  She’d panicked and thrashed, and a thorn had cut into her leg. A thin stream of blood trickled down her calf, soaking into her sock.  She winced, feeling the sting of the cut, but she couldn’t heal herself.  So she had to keep going, stumbling along in the dark. At some point she finally remembered that she could cast a light spell.  But her light was feeble and the effort of maintaining the little orb exhausted Clara more than she’d expected.

 _I must have put too much power into the search spell,_  she thought, but she couldn’t regret that.  It had been over half an hour, but the beam of light that would lead her to Yukiya still shone strongly.  As long as she had that, she was alright.  So she let the Lumen spell go out, and continued to follow her search spell.

Eventually, it led her to an outcropping of rocks.  She began picking her way over them, looking for a cave, or some hint of where he might be.  Suddenly, she heard a rustle of movement behind her, and she turned.

He was standing in the deep shadows, but as he moved she could make out the outline of his form.  The curve of his horns glittered in the moonlight.

The beast – no,  _Yukiya_ – turned towards her.  His eyes were dull, and it was clear that he was exhausted.  But at the sight of her he roared again, as if in pain, and then crouched as if to spring away.

She had to stop him from running off again.

“Mr. Lion!” she cried out.

He froze.  His ears flicked towards her.

“Are you hurt?” Clara’s voice choked with sobs, and a bit of hysterical laughter, as she continued.  “I can heal you!” She took a step forward, praying that he wouldn’t move, and he didn’t.  Instead, he started to tremble.  She could see him shaking where he stood.

“I’m a wizardess from the village.  I specialize in healing animals,” she continued, as she took more slow, limping steps in his direction, trying to ignore the sting in her leg. He continued to stare at her, his gaze rounded with shock.  “I’m not good for much else, but I’ve been working on my magic with a good friend,” she added with a rueful smile, tears spilling from her eyes.  “He taught me a search spell the other day.  And it worked!”

She was close enough to touch him now.  Yukiya made a whuffing noise, and Clara managed to laugh, shaky with relief. “I found you with my search spell.  So please don’t run away again, okay?”

With a sigh, Yukiya sank down onto the ground, and she threw her arms around his neck.  In response, he butted her with his head.  Then he made a noise of consternation and nosed her leg, where the blood still oozed from the thorn scratch.  Clara winced as he slowly licked the cut.

“Yukiya!” she scolded.  “Don’t worry about me!  You were so sick before!  We have to get you fixed up…”

She pulled out her wand, and cast a Sanatio Aura spell.  But as the healing wind surrounded them both, Clara was beset by a wave of exhaustion, and she collapsed against his side.  Yukiya whined, clearly alarmed.

“It’s okay,” she murmured, suddenly feeling extremely sleepy.  “I just used up all my magic, that’s all… ugh…”  Her eyelids drooped, but she hugged the furry body next to her with all her strength.  “Don’t you run away, Yukiya… stay… with me…”

The last thing she felt was Yukiya’s tongue licking at her face, and she smiled, even as darkness overtook her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Autumn for beta reading this chapter for me!


	6. Chapter 6

When Clara awoke, it was in her bed, and to the smell of stew.  She squinted in the morning light, and saw a familiar figure sitting at her kitchen table. “Yukiya!”

“You’re awake.” He stood, turning to face her. There was a little hitch in his movement, as if he had prepared to rush over to her side, before he seemed to catch himself and hold back.  He looked a little tired, but otherwise his normal self, with no signs of fever, and eyepatch firmly back in place. “How do you feel? Are you cold?”

Something about the situation seemed incredibly familiar. With a flash of panic, Clara realized why. She leapt out of her bed, heedless of her blanket sliding to the floor behind her. As soon as she reached Yukiya, she clamped her arms desperately around his middle.

“Clara…” He sounded bewildered, but he stayed still, his voice low and gentle.  “What’s wrong?”

“Last time we did this, you left!”  She scowled deeply. “You’re not going anywhere this time, Yukiya! I won’t let you!”

There was a bemused silence, and then he began to shake.  When Clara peered up, she was shocked to see Yukiya laughing quietly.  “W-what…”

“It’s alright,” he replied, still smiling faintly. His hand came up to pat the top of her head.  “I won’t leave.” Then he suddenly hesitated, a shadow crossing his expression.  “Unless you want me to.”

“No!  Stay here.” She paused. “…Please?”

“Yes.” His words were soft, but full of conviction.  “I won’t run away anymore.”

Crisis averted, they sat together and ate the stew that Yukiya had prepared. To Clara’s surprise, he had added orange peel to it, which gave the stew a wonderfully aromatic depth. They spent the meal in a companionable silence, interrupted only by the occasional comment on the food.

Then, after they’d worked together to wash and put away the dishes, Yukiya gestured to her and she followed.  They slipped outside the house, and he led her to their favorite spot on the riverbank. As she settled there beside him, she realized that this was where they’d first met – as girl and beast.

“Yukiya,” she began. “You don’t have to tell me anything if you don’t want,” she began.  “But if you do, I promise - I’m not afraid.”

He stared at the water. “I know,” he answered.  Then he turned to her.  “You accepted me, even in… _that_ form.”   His voice was dark with loathing.

“Yukiya…” She reached her hand out to squeeze at his shoulder reassuringly. “Tell me.”

“I will,” he promised. “Everything.”

* * *

It was a long moment before he began, but when he did, it was barely audible, and she had to move closer to hear him.

“I was born in a village much like yours,” he said, with a faraway smile. “Remote, quiet, small.  And everyone in the village was nice.  Just like here. I was the eldest of seven, and I was always taking care of my little siblings…” he trailed off, the expression on his face soft.  “My youngest sister never left my side.  She was always following me around.”

“It sounds like you were a wonderful big brother,” Clara ventured.  It explained so much about his personality, how he was gentle to his very core.

“Our family didn’t have much, but we were happy.” He took another breath, and the expression on his face suddenly grew colder.  “One day, my mother asked me to go run an errand, to pick up something across town. For some reason, I had a bad feeling about it, but she really wanted me to go.  So I did.”

He stopped there. Clara turned to look into his face, and at the sight of his expression she couldn’t help but lean closer, gently brushing shoulders.  He stared back at her, and in time something seemed to ease in him.

“When I got back, I could smell smoke, and blood.  There were raiders.  They had come to attack my village.”  He grew quiet again, before visibly collecting himself to forge on. “They were in my home.”

Clara gasped.  “Oh no,” she whimpered, almost inaudibly.

He continued. “My siblings were hiding under the table. The raiders were about to kill my parents in front of them,” he said flatly.  “When I got home, they turned around.  And they decided to kill me first.”

“Yukiya…”

“I didn’t even feel fear,” he continued, face ashen.  “It was…helplessness. Why couldn’t I do anything?  There was nothing I could do to save them. Everyone was going to die…and there was _nothing I could do about it._ ” He inhaled slowly.  “Then, suddenly everything went dark, and a voice was talking to me.”

Clara went still.  

“I didn’t know who it was at first.  But then a large, gray wolf appeared, and it offered me a deal.”

“Wha – a _wolf_?”  Clara gasped. “You can’t mean – _Wolfy?_ ”

Yukiya’s mouth tightened bitterly.  “Yes. He offered me the power of magic in exchange for a piece of my soul. A magical contract.”  He shut his eyes.  “I didn’t know what it meant at the time.  But he pointed out that if I said no, everyone was going to die. So I agreed.” He reached up and carefully removed his eyepatch.

Clara stared as his left eye was revealed.  At first glance, it seemed to be a different color entirely, but when she looked more closely, she realized that the discoloration came not from the iris itself, but from a symbol that seemed to have been marked there.  “Is that…”

“It was to seal our contract.  He burned it into my eye. And then, it was done.  I felt my magical power for the first time.”  He went quiet for a moment, before adding, “The village and my family survived.”

It was odd, Clara thought. He sounded so _empty_ when he said it.  He’d saved dozens of people, maybe more, but his voice was clipped, as if he were confessing a crime, some terrible thing.  

“A few weeks later, the full moon came.  And I…transformed.  Right there, in the house, in front of my whole family.  Into… _that_.”  

Clara’s chest tightened in sympathy.  How terrified he must have been, first to be so ill with fever, and then to experience that transformation without warning, for the first time.  

“I found the wolf.  I begged him to reverse the contract.  But he said it was part of the deal…” Yukiya shut his eyes.  “Even my parents were afraid. I remember my little sister’s voice, screaming in fear. Of me.”

He stopped again. Clara had the sense that he’d been about to say more, but that he’d decided not to.  

“Each time I thought I might be losing more control, and I didn’t want to put my family in danger. So I decided to leave.”  After another pause, he looked over at her, and gave her a tiny, bitter smile.  “That’s why I ended up at the Academy, you know.  I was hoping Headmaster Randolph could help me break the contract.  But even he couldn’t.  So he suggested that I stay on as a student, to at least learn how to control my power.

“So I enrolled at the Academy.  Elias was the only one who didn’t care about the curse.  Said it was stupid.”  Yukiya’s lips twitched into a small, fond smile.  “No one wanted to be my roommate, of course. But Elias volunteered to give up his single so that I could room with him.”

 _Elias…_ Clara felt her chest grow warm.   _He’s really a nice person.  I knew it._

Then she frowned. Yukiya and Elias had clearly become friends, judging from how they acted around each other. “But then why did you leave school?”

Yukiya shut his eyes for a moment, and Clara fell silent.  When he spoke again, it wasn’t what she expected.

“Have you heard of the Tower of Sorrow?”

Clara blinked.  “Of course.  Everyone here knows the fairytale.  The Dragon of Time, imprisoned and turned to stone….”

Yukiya smiled grimly. “I thought it was a fairytale growing up too.  But it’s not.”

“ _What?”_

“The Tower of Sorrow is in a deep forest to the east of the Academy,” Yukiya said.  “And that forest is charmed to confuse and mislead anyone who enters. It gives you terrible hallucinations.”  He paused. “Unless you can speak to animals. Then you can hear a song that is sung from within the Tower, and follow it, in order to avoid getting lost.”

“Did you…” Clara breathed.

“Not by choice.  It was a classmate who made me do it.  Luca Orlem. He wanted to reach the Tower, but he wouldn’t tell me why.  He found out that I could hear the song.”  Yukiya narrowed his eyes, and Clara could see the misery that gathered there, like storm clouds.  “I refused to take him at first.  But he threatened to spread some rumors about Elias – rumors that would have really hurt him. So I went along with it.”

“What happened?”

Yukiya looked away, gaze settling on the river.  Clara gave him his time, her own eyes casting downwards to look at Yukiya’s hands where they rested on the grass.  She suddenly had an urge to reach out and take them.  Bashfully, she fisted her own hands, fighting the impulse.

“It didn’t turn out well,” he finally said.  “In the forest, I could follow the song, but…” He flinched. “The forest does strange things to you,” he continued.  “It shows you things that aren’t real.  And it showed me…”

Yukiya stopped, looking down at Clara.  His expression tightened.  “It showed me visions of me in…that form.  Hurting people. Hurting my family.”

She couldn’t help it anymore.  Clara reached out to take Yukiya’s hands, and she found them clammy, damp with nervousness. She moved closer, attempting to enfold both of his large hands in her own.

He stared down at their clasped hands and squeezed gently.  “It was a full moon that night. And I…I heard the voices. I transformed.” His voice broke as he confessed, “I…hurt Luca.”

“Yukiya,” Clara whispered. “It wasn’t your fault, was it? You weren’t in your right mind.”

“It doesn’t matter,” Yukiya answered, his voice flat, but Clara could feel the tension in his grip, as if anguish and shame ran under his skin and through his very veins. “Afterwards, I ran.  I left him alone in the forest.  And the forest told me…”  He took a breath.  “The forest convinced me that I’d killed him.”

Around them, the wind stirred, a ripple of movement rolling through the grasses.  The sun emerged from behind a cloud, the gentle rays warming them.  But Clara could think of nothing but of a forest of horrors, one that had convinced Yukiya that he’d committed the ultimate crime.

“That’s why I ran from you yesterday,” Yukiya began again, his voice very quiet.  “I was afraid it would happen again.  But you came after me on your own.  And your voice…”  He sighed. “It calmed me, more than anything.” Suddenly, he moved to gather her in his arms.  Clara jerked in surprise, heart pounding hard as she was placed on his lap.  She flushed scarlet, ducking her head against the embarrassment that overcame her like a wave.  But Yukiya didn’t seem to notice, keeping his arms firmly around her.

“I ran from the school that next day,” Yukiya whispered in her ear.  “I kept seeing Luca’s body, and then the bodies of my parents, my siblings…all because of me.  Later I found out that Luca was alive, but I was so afraid of putting someone else in danger.  I ran, far away.  Until I met you.”  

“Yukiya,” she breathed. “Why did you tell me you were cursed? It doesn’t sound like a curse to me.”

His expression shuttered. “It _is_ a curse, Clara.  My magic…and the way it came about, and the terror it brought to me and my family. It’s a curse.  How can it be anything else?”  He let out a breath.

Clara was stunned.   _He couldn’t be more wrong,_ she thought in a daze.   _Everything that he’s done…_

Her thoughts were suddenly interrupted as his arms tightened around her. Yukiya had pulled her close to him, and suddenly she realized that she could hear his heartbeat beating rapidly under her cheek.  

“I’m tired of running. I don’t want to run any more.  Not from you. But…Clara…” She heard his voice tremble with anguish.  “The way I am…it’s only a matter of time. _What would I do if I hurt you_?”

Suddenly Clara pulled her hands free, only to throw them around his waist.  There was a moment of embarrassed shock, when she could hardly believe her own daring but she held on tightly.  “You didn’t. Not yesterday.  Not ever.”  

He was still shaking. She wished her arms were longer so that she could reach and hold more of him all at once.  “Yukiya…you’ve been calling your magic a curse.  But all this time, you’ve been trying to protect people.”

She felt him go still.

“Even at the beginning, you accepted the contract to protect your family, and your village.  And you did.  You saved everyone. And even now, ever since we met, you’ve done nothing but take care of me,” she continued, thinking of the way the beast – no, _Yukiya_ – had chased after her as she’d been carried down the river, the gifts he’d brought her, the days he’d spent patiently nurturing her uncooperative magic just to indulge a silly girl’s dream.  

“Your magic isn’t a curse,” she whispered.  “It’s a part of you. You got it because you’re kind, and because you wanted to protect the people you loved.  And I know you won’t ever hurt me.  Because even the beast that I met that night…I knew he was kind.  I could feel it the moment I met him.”

“Clara…”

“I trust you,” she breathed, and she heard a hitch in his breath.

In the silence that followed, she could hear nothing but the soft gasps of Yukiya’s breathing.  In that moment, she felt as if she finally knew him.  This man, who had loved his family so deeply that his desperation to protect them had attracted an evil spirit; who had been tormented by the price he paid not because of his own suffering, but because of the fear he’d engendered amongst those loved ones; who’d banished himself for sins he’d never committed; and who’d denied himself all contact for fear of committing them.  

 _This_ was Yukiya, she thought – so quiet, and yet when she came close enough, she could feel all his emotions thrumming underneath his skin with an intensity that left her breathless. Gentle, nurturing Yukiya, who’d cared for a whole family of children; strong, capable Yukiya, who’d built her a hummingbird feeder with his own two hands.  Patient, encouraging Yukiya, who’d whispered the words of a search spell in her ears, and believed in her even when she failed.

And Yukiya, who had run, denying himself a lifetime of family and friendship, rather than be the cause of anyone’s suffering.

Now at last, she knew him. She felt as if she was holding the whole of him in her hands, as he breathed in her arms, shaking with feeling, replete with life.

 _This wonderful man_ , she thought as tears rolled down her cheeks. She couldn’t help those tears, shed in grief and sorrow for a man had suffered so much only because he had been too good.

“Clara,” he whispered, sounding broken.  “Clara.”

He repeated her name, over and over again. It was as if he’d exhausted himself in the telling of his story, and had no strength to say anything else.

Or maybe he was clinging, with voice and hands and all his strength, to the only thing he felt had left.

* * *

That night, he brought her to the cave where he’d stayed, and she watched in admiration as he conjured a comfortable looking but simple sleeping bag and pillow, and enchanted it for warmth.  In a gesture of kindness he conjured a large blanket, and draped it around their shoulders.

They lay side by side under the blanket, fingers barely brushing each other.  Yukiya was telling her a story about the stars that he’d once told to his younger siblings, and she struggled to listen, but she couldn’t help her thoughts as they wandered. There had been many secrets revealed that morning, but between the two of them, nothing else had been said.

The last time she’d told him that she’d loved him, he’d denied her.  But earlier, he’d confessed that he’d never wanted to run from her again.

And now, she wasn’t sure where they stood at all.  

“Clara? You aren’t listening.  Is everything okay?”

“Ahhh…”  Her cheeks burned with guilt.  “Sorry, Yukiya.  I’m j-just a little tired,” she fibbed awkwardly.  

There was a perceptive silence.  “Tell me what you were thinking of.”

Clara winced.  Yukiya always seemed to know when she was lying. “I…” What was she supposed to say?  

Suddenly, under the blanket, she felt him take her hand and squeeze.  She nearly jerked away in surprise.  

“Is that better?” he asked.

“B-better?”  she repeated, face aflame.  “Y-Yukiya…”  She swallowed back a wave of anxiety.  Was he doing this only as a friend?  To calm her down, perhaps? _“She’s been cooking for me…so I try to help her out.”_ She clenched her eyes shut, remembering the day he’d said that. Her heart thundered nervously.  “W-what is this?”

“Clara?”

She gulped back another shudder of nerves.  “W-what does it mean when you take my hand?”

There was a silence that seemed to make the air heavy around them.  And then, as Clara began to feel the prickle of shameful tears behind her eyelids, she saw Yukiya turn to move over her.  Her face flamed as he loomed over her, and she looked away shyly before she felt his hand gently tilt her head back so that she faced him, wide-eyed and trembling.

“It means that I’m worried about you,” he answered slowly. “It means I care for you.” He took a breath. “It means I love you.”

Clara went rigid with shock.

“Ever since I first saw you,” he whispered.  Did she imagine the blush on his cheeks?  “That day I brought you home.  You were so small and cold, and hurt.  I tried to leave you the next morning.  But for some reason, I couldn’t.  So I stayed nearby…”  He looked down self-consciously.  “I thought of you every day.  I’d come and check on you at night to make sure you were alright.”  She felt his fingers trace a gentle line along the side of her jaw. “I told myself that every night would be the last, that I had to move on, and that you would be alright…but then you started leaving those sandwiches, and then you stayed up that night to wait for me…”  He stared down at her.  “Clara.” He hesitated for a moment.  “I can’t stay away from you, no matter how hard I try.  And I don’t want to.  Not anymore.”

A noise escaped her throat, and she realized dimly that it was a sob.  Yukiya’s expression shifted minutely, to one of concern. Not knowing what else to do, she turned her head to kiss his fingers.

The minute she did so, she felt embarrassment flood her body.  Stupid, stupid, she thought.  What kind of girl did that?  What was that supposed to be, kissing a guy’s fingers?  But Yukiya was staring down at his hands, awestruck, as if they’d been anointed with the rarest gift, and suddenly she felt herself being pulled close to him, until she was staring deeply into his exposed eye.

With trembling hands, she reached up, touching the band that held his eyepatch in place.  She hesitated, and he nodded.  She slid her fingers under the band, through the short silky locks of his hair, and gently lifted the eyepatch off.

He stared at her, solemn and beautiful.  It was unspeakably intimate to gaze upon his whole face, a part of him she knew he’d never reveal to anyone else.

“Clara,” he breathed. “Tell me you feel it too.”

“I do,” she whispered.

And then he kissed her.


	7. Epilogue

“I’ve done all the research I can from here,” Elias hummed thoughtfully.  “I can’t find any records of that kind of magical creature.  I might have more luck at the library or the archives at school.”

They were seated around Clara's dining table.  Nearby, Elias’ bags sat, fully packed.  The blond haired boy was planning to catch the noon train back to the Academy. Apparently their break was over, and classes would resume the next day.

Clara sighed with longing. If only she was getting on that train too!  Next to her, Yukiya reached over and squeezed her hand, eliciting a blush.  “Be patient,” he said.  “I bet next time, it’ll be your turn.”

“You’re going to give the application one more try, then?” Elias asked.

Clara nodded brightly. “Thanks in part to you, Elias! You helped me so much!”

“I-I d-didn’t do anything,” Elias stammered, turning pink.  

“Elias,” Yukiya interjected. “I appreciate it. Everything.”

Elias turned even brighter and nodded awkwardly.

“Besides,” Clara added. “I have new goals I can write about on the application now.”  She smiled tentatively at Yukiya.  “I’m going to study really hard. And one day, I’ll help Yukiya break his contract.”

Elias’ expression sobered. “That’s not going to be easy. That kind of magical beast…you don’t know what it’s capable of.”

“I have to try!” Clara insisted.  “Even if I don’t get in.  I’ll figure out a way to help Yukiya on my own.”

Elias smiled faintly with approval.  Then he turned to Yukiya.  “Are you sure you don’t want to come back to school with me?  The headmaster said you’re welcome back whenever you want.”

Yukiya shook his head. “I’m going to stay here for now.”

Elias hesitated.  “If it’s about Luca…well…” He looked down.  “He wanted me to tell you that there are no hard feelings.”

Yukiya’s gaze dropped to the ground, briefly.  “Thanks,” he mumbled.  And then he looked back up, as if startled.  “You’re carrying messages for Luca now?”

Elias’ face suddenly flamed. “W-We’ve come to an understanding.”

Clara blinked. What did he mean by that?  “What kind of understanding?”

“I-It’s nothing!” Elias barked, face almost scarlet. He cringed a little from Yukiya’s assessing stare. “L-Look, I have to go now, or else I’m going to be late!”  Elias grabbed his bags, almost rushing for the door.  

“Oh!  Wait!”  Clara ran to the cupboard.  Pulling out an item, she hurried over to Elias.  “I almost forgot.  I wanted you to take this!”

Elias glanced down in surprise.  “Glowcap oil? Clara, I can’t…”

“Please!  Didn’t you say your brother liked it?”  She pushed the jar into his hands.  “It’s the very least I can do.  And take some cookies with you, for the train.”  She rushed back into the kitchen, carefully withdrawing several large cookies from a jar and putting them in a bag which she brought back to him.

“I-If you insist,” he stammered, with far less vehemence.  Clara and Yukiya shared a knowing look.  

Gifts packed away, Elias turned and headed towards the door.

“Elias,” Yukiya called out. The blond boy paused.  “Have a safe trip.  I’ll see you again, soon.”

“Good bye!” Clara cheerfully waved.  “Thank you for everything, Elias!”

Elias smiled, and nodded back to them, before he disappeared outside.

* * *

“Mr. Wolf.”

As always, the beast was ignoring her.  

“I know you can hear me,” Clara sighed.  “Why are you so stubborn?”

It turned its head to gaze at her, unimpressed.

“What are you doing?” she asked.  “Why are you here?  What do you want from Yukiya?”

There was a long silence, during which she heard nothing but leaves rustling in the breeze, and the far-off gossip of magpies.  Just as she was about to give up and say goodbye, the wolf spoke.

“I enjoyed it,” the wolf announced.  “I enjoyed watching him torment himself.”

“What…” Clara trailed off, stunned into speechlessness.  How could anyone say that?  Yukiya had suffered each month, and condemned himself to a lifetime of self-loathing…and the wolf had _enjoyed_ it?  

What kind of creature were they dealing with?

She tried to get a hold on the chill of fear that had slowly crept into her chest.  “What are you going to do now?”

The wolf huffed. “Nothing.  Nothing has changed.  In fact,” he slanted a gaze at her, “things might get even more interesting.” And then he stared Clara in the eye. “Can I have another bone?”

The chill of fear went away. Clara almost laughed aloud.

Whatever he was, he was still a wolf.  She wasn’t going to give up on him.  One day, maybe, she could convince him to reverse the contract – or maybe, accept another one in its place.

“Sure,” she relented, and felt a little cheered by the way the wolf waved its tail.

 _One day_ , she thought. Until then, she would have to work harder than ever.

* * *

In the months that followed, Clara and Yukiya fell back into their old routine, except that Yukiya finally began to stay at her house for good.  With some coaxing Clara convinced him to take her parents’ old bedroom.  

For three weeks, each night he gave her a kiss, and they retreated to separate rooms, each lying awake and thinking about the other, separated by a wall, mere feet away, until the night of the next full moon.  Seeing Yukiya’s renewed illness, Clara could not be persuaded to leave him.  And then, in the middle of the night, she awoke suddenly and found herself surrounded by a warm body covered in soft black fur.

Still half-asleep, she gazed into a pair of cautious yellow eyes, and kissed him on the muzzle.

“I’m not leaving,” she mumbled. “So fuzzy,” she added before curling against him and falling back asleep.

* * *

In time, the village came to accept Yukiya’s presence, not only as a permanent fixture in Clara’s life but in his own right.  The effort was led by Fran and Grandma Ellie, who had visited again after that one fateful night.  Fran had expressed her remorse through large gift baskets of baked goods, which was a blessing because Yukiya ate a _lot._

Eventually the two of them paved the way for other villagers to hesitantly introduce themselves, sometimes led by their animals.  When Yukiya began hiring himself out to do work around town, it cemented their acceptance of the quiet but kind boy with the incredible strength and odd eyepatch. The wolf made himself scarce during those visits, preferring to lounge in Clara’s garden and scare the rabbits that occasionally appeared.  He never actually caught one, though.

Yukiya’s monthly transformations were still largely secret.  Eventually, he grew comfortable enough to let Clara ride on his back while they wandered the night together.  She always fell asleep at some point, and he always brought her home.  

Elias wrote letters every couple of weeks, keeping them updated on news, and occasionally sending reading lists and spell suggestions for Clara to study.  There was usually a short post-script – something uncharacteristically irreverent, a joke, or a sketch – which Yukiya said must be from Luca.

And Yukiya and Clara continued to study magic together, each day.  Together, they put together a new application for Clara.  When it was complete, the mail owls cheered and hooted and wished her the best of luck, dispatching the strongest of them to carry it in the direction of the Academy.

And then, one day….

“Clara Hart!  Is this the house of Clara Hart?”

From where she sat at the table, looking over a book, Clara looked up at the door in surprise.  The male voice outside was unfamiliar.  “What…”

Yukiya went still for a moment.  And then, suddenly, a faint smile appeared on his face.  “Clara,” he said, gently.  “Why don’t you go answer that?”

“O-Okay,” she agreed. She rushed over, and opened the door, but to her surprise, no one was there.  “Huh?”

“Up here!”

Something bumped her on the head.  “Ouch!” she cried, before looking up.  “What…it’s…”

She froze, mouth hanging slack in shock.  It was a yellowed piece of parchment, waving its corners around like arms, and it sounded decidedly imperious.  “Hey, what’s wrong with you?  Shut your mouth - you’ll catch flies that way!”  

It continued to nag, but she barely heard a word.  Instead, she turned back to Yukiya.  “Yukiya…is this…”

As she watched, a warm smile appeared on Yukiya’s face.  “Congratulations Clara.”

“I-I…” The world before her seemed to blur, and belatedly she realized that it was because tears had filled her eyes.  “Y-Yukiya!” She ran back and dove into his arms. “I c-can’t believe it…”  And she started to laugh, which seemed ridiculous because she had also started to sob.

“You did it,” Yukiya whispered, before pressing a tender kiss to her forehead.  With a gentle swipe, he wiped her tear tracks away.

“Hey!” The letter waved a corner.  “What’s wrong with you, girl?  Why are you crying?!” Then it seemed to tilt curiously.  “And you back there! Haven’t I met you before?  What are you doing in this town?  Why aren’t you at school like you’re supposed to be?”

Yukiya gave her one last squeeze.  “Go pay attention to the letter,” he said.  “You’ve got to get the full experience, right?”

“R-right!” Clara managed through a nervous giggle, before she turned back to listen to what the letter had to say.

It didn’t take her long to pack.  She didn’t have much, after all, and Yukiya had even less.  Saying goodbye to the villagers took the longest time.  Many of them sent gifts, and there were many promises exchanged for both of them to return home soon.

Finally, the next morning dawned.  Clara and Yukiya stepped outside the house, luggage in hand, in matching uniforms, a sight that she took the time to savor.

 _I still can’t believe it,_ she thought to herself, for what must have been the hundredth time.   _Finally.  It’s finally happening._

“Now this is the last step!” The Letter spun around proudly, and something appeared in her hand.  It was a badge – shining golden in the morning light.  “That’s _very_ important! Don’t lose it!”

“O-Okay!”  Clara pinned it on her uniform immediately.

And then it began to glow.

“What…” She looked over, and realized that Yukiya’s badge was also glowing. From each emblem appeared a shining veil of light that combined, to form a shimmering sphere between them.

Then the sphere burst, and they were showered by tiny particles of light.  

“Wow!” The Letter went stiff with shock.  “I’ve never seen it happen so fast before! Dear me!”

“Yukiya?” Clara ventured, looking around.  The magical lights had disappeared.  She peered down at her emblem, seeing that it had returned back to normal.  “W-What just happened?  Is everything okay?”

Suddenly she found herself encircled by a pair of arms.  Yukiya pulled her close, and to her surprise and delight, he was smiling openly, eyes warm with a deep, tender joy.

For a moment she could only stare at him, trying to memorize his expression, that beautiful and rare smile that he only ever showed to her. Then she took the opportunity to press closer, loving the warmth of him, and the sound of his heartbeat, strong and steady against her cheek.

“Let’s go,” he said.  They separated slowly and began to walk together, hand in hand, side by side.  “I’ll tell you on the train.  I promise.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT’S FINALLY DONE!!!!
> 
> I’m so happy that I barely know where to start. First and foremost, thank you to everyone who has been following this story, leaving your comments and reblogs and likes, and keeping me writing through five long months and over 20,000 words. It has been a true joy to watch this story take shape, and see it evolve far beyond what I initially imagined.
> 
> A few specific shoutouts:
> 
> \- wanderbrack for their lovely portrayal of the seashell scene in Chapter 4
> 
> \- gorecorset for their beautiful aesthetic featuring the Clara of this story that perfectly captured the mood
> 
> \- autumnlovesotome for their excellent beta job on Chapter 5, an involved chapter that benefitted very much from her help
> 
> Thank you all for giving me the opportunity to tell this story!


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